Me Love You Long Time!

Family is banned from this post. Period. Go away.

Will husbands ever learn?

What my husband doesn’t understand (or doesn’t care about) is that the thing that makes me hot is the most simple thing on the face of the earth.

Do something without being asked. OR do something WHEN asked the first time. That’s all it takes. Example. Our side tables and coffee tables came in today. I told him that yesterday. This morning I asked him when (what day) he planned on going to pick them up. I am having a Longaberger party on Sunday. Before then the living room needs rearranged and the tables need to be picked up. Without rearranging the living room, the tables won’t fit.

Now in the past, I have always rearranged all rooms BY MYSELF. Meaning that I, all alone, move all the furniture. I have moved the entire queen sized bed from room to room, sideways through a doorway- by myself TWICE. I used to move the couch by myself. I have moved the refrigerator by myself. Maybe instead of Wonder Woman my site should be “she-hulk” but previously we had CARPET and now that we have hardwood, I can’t move furniture by myself. And it DRIVES ME CRAZY. If I had to depend on my husband to move furniture, I would be waiting for weeks. Because he loves to procrastinate. The words that come out of his mouth more often than “I love you” are “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

If you know me, you will know that I am a demanding personality and I have NO PATIENCE. I have to say that 99% of our arguments are related to moments when his procrastinating comes up against my “I want it done YESTERDAY” attitude. So this morning when I asked him, I was thinking of all the things that need to be DONE, including me wanting to get things on the tables and everything organized, and when he answered “Maybe Sunday” (the day before the party and 4 days after the tables arrived) I had to hold my anger in. I just said “well, I would really appreciate it if you could get them on Friday, or maybe Saturday morning” and he said “I’ll try” (second most popular phrase out of his mouth) and I said “if all you can do is try, than I can go get them myself.” And he said “well how am I supposed to know what vehicle or trailer they will fit in” and my answer (as I am walking out the door for work, inserting earrings, and slipping into shoes all at the same time and he is lying on the couch sleeping) was “You are a big boy. I have the measurements of the tables. Look at them and FIGURE IT OUT!” and then I left.

I could already see the fight forming when he went on SUNDAY at 3pm to pick up the tables and left me alone at home the whole night to put them into place.

Well, I was surprised that he called me at 3:30pm the very same day, and said “I am going to go get the tables today” as if it were nothing. WTF changed his mind? I was SO HAPPY! I don’t have the energy to argue about every little thing! I just don’t. But at the same time I am tired of letting “things” that are supposed to be done just slide and slide and slide. It is so frustrating.

But today I was so so so so happy to have him just out of the blue say “I am going to get the tables” and then we discovered that they are UNASSEMBLED! Argh! Those tables cost a shitload of money at Sofa Mart and they are Unassembled? WTF? So husband said “It’s a good thing I am going to pick them up today, otherwise we wouldn’t have time to assemble them!” and Now I am wondering how long until they are assembled. I can see them sitting in the garage next to my new dryer. It’s been there a month already and it isn’t installed.

But if men only knew that a guaranteed way to get a horny wife was to assemble her tables and put the dryer in without being told…. They would get it more often. LOL.