Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Dear McDonalds, Princeton, Illinois

Dear McDonalds in Princeton, Illinois-

Your evil greasy goodness is only second to that of Wal-Mart.

That said, I am very upset about my visit this evening. You see, I follow the South Beach "lifestyle" because of health issues that I have. I purchase alot of your salads and fruit and yogurt parfaits, along with your overpriced bottles of water. Every now and again (once every 2-3 months) I get a craving for your french fries and perhaps a burger. Tonight was one of those occasions.

I waited in the drive through line for about 10 minutes. I placed my order. I was salivating over the thought of my burger and fries. When I finally got to window 1, (which amazingly was actually staffed!) I handed the girl in a visor my debit card, to which she replied "It isn't working, I can try it though." Uh. Okay. Why don't you then. Either it's WORKING or it ISN'T.

I said "I hope it's working because I don't have any cash." and she swiped my card, thew up her hands, and said "Nope, not working...." then handed back the card and stared at me blankly. I said "So no food for me? It's my problem then, not yours?" and she said "let me go check" (bounces away... bounces back) "yep, there's nothing we can do about it."

Okay. Let's revisit that sentence. THERE'S NOTHING WE CAN DO ABOUT IT.

Let's go over a few options:

1. You put a sign, even a handwritten one, taped to the drive through speaker dealy, that says "We apologize for any inconvenience, but we are unable to process debit/credit card payments at this time." (feel free to insert your own McD's slang language here, if it better suits you...)

2. You give me my food for free, because you do it for that guy you went down on in the parking lot after your shift was over.

3. You give me my food for free, with a manager's override, as I have seen you do before, because it's your problem not mine and I want my fucking once in a blue moon burger and when I am hungry it get cranky.

3. You fix your goddamned machine so that this isn't the third time this has happened to me at your establishment in the last two months.

Just a thought. Or two. For you to ponder. Yeah. Go sit on that for a while.

It is with deep regret that I inform you, your business went to Burger King instead. I didn't wait in line, my food was hot and fresh, their debit card machine worked, AND I was told THANK YOU by a smiling woman in a uniform 100% less greasy than yours.

Dismayed Customer,
Meagan Johnson
Wyanet, Illinois

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1 comment:

Michelle said...

Too funny, not your experience but your letter!

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