We're Halfway There...

Good morning! Today and the rest of the week I will be working earlier than usual... which means I have to wake up earlier than usual. Cause and Effect.

Let's see... what do I have to talk about? Oh not much. Last night I had a meeting and I learned even more goodies about NeighborMom. I had heard before that she had ran out screaming at a man who was mowing a yard and got too close to her property line, but afterwards she put out these ridiculous little plastic fences on her property line to prevent them from mowing too close and prove her point. And when she was yelling at the poor MowerMan, I heard there was profanity used. All over an accidental mowing. I also heard that she sent NeighborBoyfriend out on a mission, and when NeighborByofriend saw MowerMen mowing a business in Princeton, she made NeighborBoyfriend go out to the mowers and threaten them with a lawsuit and legal action. How ridiculous is this? My family has told me that it is time to begin documenting every time I see the NeighborDog in my yard, and everytime the Neighbor Dog barks for 14 continuous hours while tangled around a tree behind my house. And so, the documentation begins. I was also determining how NeighborMom would sue me if she started reading my blog and thought I was tarnishing her "good name" **snicker** good name. LOL. But I figure that I have never mentioned names, or addresses, or where she works, or anything randomly identifying except that she is an annoying neighbor.... and where's the crime in that?

After my meeting I went home and took a nice long walk around town, complete with iPod and flip flops. At the end of my walk I decided to sit on the swing in the yard, and singing along with my iPod, and I didn't have to worry about bothering NeighborFamily because as soon as the temperatures got to 70 degrees, they started closing up the windows and hibernating inside with the AC on. Which is nice because then we can't hear NeighborMom barking orders at the NeighborKids. So I was able to sing along, and eventually I slid into a lying down and rocking on the swing position, where I stayed for a couple of hours... until it got super cool and breezy outside and I decided to go to sleep, somewhere around midnight. When I got up I felt that my ass and side of my leg was wet because apparently the swing cushion was damp and I didn't even realize it. Oh whatever.

I spent most of my time on the swing planning out a mental fence between NeighborHouse and my property line. I was trying to determine if a zoning board would permit a fence to be built, whether or not NeighborMom would follow in her traditional bitch-like manner and object to the fence, and whether or not she would attempt to slap a lawsuit on me for having a fence in my own yard. Then I grinned with Glee when I thought of my own lawyer and his evil genious-ness. I also thought about NeighborDog and his neverending yip yap anklebiter bark, for hours and hours from 7am through 2pm everyday as they are holed up in their AC and tie him out alone in their yard, or my yard, whichever seemed to suit them at the time.

And I thought about how I had heard rumors that a Local Manufacturing Plant could be moving to Mexico, which is where NeighborBoyfriend works, and how the rumors said that if the plant moved, so would NeighborMom and NeighborBoyfriend.... and all my problems would be SOLVED! At least temporarily. And while I don't want a manufacturing facility to close, and many people here to lose their jobs, including many people that I know and like, I can't help but selfishly hope that NeighborMom has to move back down south and leave the nice little town of Wyanet alone.

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• IdRatherHaveFlanders