The Biggest Loser

Last night mom and I watched the season finale of the Biggest loser. This season, I never watched once, but just from the finale, I could tell that the results were amazing. I started to get curious about how in the world a person loses that much weight, and thought of the guy who lost 26 pounds in one week. A GOOD weight loss, that is recommended by Doctors, is no more than 10 pounds a month. When I was exercising, I lost 10 poinds the first month and 9 the second month. That seems healthy, and realistic, considering I was working my ass off, eating VERY carefully, and not taking any drugs or supplements. I really started to wonder about that, and then today, MSN runs a story (interview with a doctor) who explains how people are able to lose that much weight that rapidly. It was interesting, and he brought up points that I hadn't really thought about, like how these people have NO JOBS when they are doing this, a personal trainer, and an optimum diet. Not to mention 3 hours of excercise per day. 2 hours of cardio and 1 hour of strength. The average "exercising" person in the real world might get 1 hour of exercise 3 times a week. So that's 3 hours for the average person, versus 21 hours for the "biggest loser" contestant. Not to mention that they are cutting their calories consumed by about 1/3 their previous diet and working off way more than they consume.

Here's the article http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9880085/

And for those of you who are curious, the photos of the 15 pound burgers are taken at Denny's Beer Barrel Pub, the Guiness Record Holder for the largest burger. And yes, they are the same pub featured on the Hardee's Thickburger commercial. How cool is that? Here is there website:
http://www.dennysbeerbarrelpub.com/ and a great article about their 11 pound (and other large) burgers. You can view their location, the menu, their beers on tap, and the process of making an 11 pound burger - as well as tiny "Kate" their current contestant who holds the record (also in the guiness book) for eating their entire 9 pound burger- it's all on the Denny's Website. Check it out.

Seeing Red

Well, today is Evan's birthday. It is also the day that the Sears repairman comes to look at our freezer. And we (translation, I) watched our friend's dog last night and this morning. We had Chinese with my mom last night for Evan's birthday. Then he disappeared, for a trip to "wal-mart" then he never came home. I spent the night with three dogs. It was fine. Everyone was well behaved. Then today he still isn't here, and I need to go to work, but I have our friend's dog, and also our dogs, and then the Sears guy is supposed to be coming from 8am-5pm, and someone has to be home, and not only did Evan not show up, but the contractors didn't show up today either- and this will be the second day in a row that they didn't come, with no warning or explanation... no phone call.

So I am here, needing to go to work. I have an extra dog and a Sears repairman on his way, no husband, and a house tore up with a December 5th deadline and no one working on it. And it is Evan's birthday, so I have his present all wrapped and ready to give him, and I can't even begin to imagine being nice, when really I just want to throw it at his head and say "here's your fucking present have a happy birthday by yourself because I am not speaking to you."

How is a person to handle all of these things? We recentlt (Friday) had a serious discussion, where I refrained from yelling and just plain told him how these things make me feel, make us look, and make me upset, and that did absolutely nothing.

What else am I supposed to do? Move out? Ha. Stop talking? Disappear? Smack him around? I don't get it. There is no instruction for what you do when the other spouse doesn't care what you have to say.

Update: Lunchtime....
So on my way to work I went by the bachelor pad where I was sure Evan was sleeping. I don't have their cell phone number so I can't call, and I don't know which apartment it is, so unless I want to go knocking on every door until I find the right one, I am screwed. Sure enough. There is his car. So I get in his car, pick up his cell phone. He has 10 voicemails and 10 missed calls. Fabulous. I scroll through his phone until I see the cell phone number of the bachelor. Then I call the bachelor's phone and on the 47th ring he says "hullo?" and I said "this is Meagan, is Evan there" and the bachelor said "he was asleep on the couch but I thought he went home last night, let me check" and he comes back on and says "yes, he is there and he is getting up right now. Sorry about that. " SO I get in my car and go to work.

At 11:00 Sears Home Service Calls my cell phone (the alternate number) and Tells me that he tried my home number and no one is there, and his service call is scheduled from 11:30 to noon. SO I call my house, and Evan's cell phone (apparently still on the front seat of his car at the bachelor's house) and no answer. So I have to unexpectedly leave work, clock out even though I have no PTO, and go home to wait for the Sears guy. When I get there, the dog we (translation, I) am watching is still there on the porch, happy as can be, no accidents (what a good dog!) and I let him out to play. I vacuumed the bedroom and the bathroom. I cleaned the bathroom sink and the toilet. I cleaned up in the bedroom, tidied up the bed, hung up clothes, folded blankets, etc. The contractor shows up and starts staining the floor. Apparently his assistant has disappeared and won't answer his door. So he didn't come to work the past two days. No big deal right?

Then the sears guy comes and when he looks at the freezer he finds that there is a restriction in the freon tubing that can't be accessed because it is inside the body of the freezer. It's covered under warranty but it isn't repairable, so now we need to go to Sears and pick out a new freezer that the warranty will cover. But that also means we have to get the old chest freezer out of the basement, have it taken away, and get the new one to our house (delivery is only covered if they delivered it the first time) and into the basement, then replenish all the food that went bad and had to be tossed. And the way that husband has been, I have a feeling this will all be a job for Meagan.

So after the sears guy leaves, I let the visitor dog outside to potty, get my shoes on, let the dog in and restrict him to the porch, say bye to the contractor, and return to work, only to have my low fuel light come on and need to stop and get gas. So I get to Princeton Casey's, pump my gas, and realize I forgot my coat.

As I am writing the check out for the gas, I remember again that it is Evan's birthday, and when I write the date something clicks- November 30th. The day that our license plates expire (both Evan's and Mine) and the day that Evan's license expires and needs to be renewed. Evan and I had discussed how he would go to the DMV today and write a check for both of our stickers and renew his license. Well, since he is asleep on some bachelor's couch, and the papers are all at home, I am incredibly frustrated. Plus I NEED to get back to work because I am off the clock and I have no PTO. So that will tell you exactly how my day has been going. And exactly how I feel about my husband right now. So tomorrow when he drives with his expired license in his car with expired plates to the DMV to get stickers for MY expired plates, I am sure there is no chance that day can go any worse than today.

tuesday

Does Love always make you want to choke someone?

Today I am contacting my insurance company over backing into that lady. I am also calling the cell phone company because husband thought it would be fun to join a $9.99/month ringtone club that auto-renews, and also to begin using the internet on the phone, which means that we get charged for each use, and our bill was $45 higher than normal, $35 of his internet useage charges. So I had to turn the internet OFF on both of our phones, which means no more sending picture messages (for either of us, it's true what they say about one person ruining the fun for everyone), to prevent this from happening again. Plus I cancelled his ringtone club, because we just can't afford crap like that, and do we REALLY need five new ringtones each month? I think not. What we really need is power and water and a few groceries now and then. It all adds up. But only the person trying to shuffle bills around to get them paid notices that.

Of course then I have been on hold with the cell phone company for over 10 minutes now to get to the billing department (Cingular.) But she was very nice once I got to her, and she did apologize about the wait.

Tonight we are eating supper with my mom to celebrate Evan's birthday, and we are also watching John and Amethyst's dog, a king charles cavalier spaniel- named Lord Tzinch (Tazinch? sorry I can't spell that!) I can totally see Hadley dragging him around the house. It should be fun.

Fender Benders and Dirt Floors

Well, today was a super productive day. That explains how tired I am tonight! I went to the bank this morning, then to work. I worked very diligently on the website. I decided that I want to get it published as soon as possible. Maybe then they will realize my potential?

Then I went to the dog kennels, and we cleaned, and then as I was leaving it was raining. I ran to my car and never really looked around. When I backed out, I was watching the line of fence posts on the edge of the parking lot, just next to my car, going very slowly as to not hit one. I couldn't see out the back window becuase it was covered in raindrops and the side mirrors were the same way, and the orangey glow of the one light on the building was causing a bad reflection. I was thinking, "please don't let me hit those metal posts" when BAM! I ran smack into the car of a lady who had parked right behind me. Parking was slim because they were having a meeting so she had parked me in, and in my hurry to get to my car I never even looked. I felt so stupid. When I looked at her car there was hardly any damage, and mine was fine. I went inside and got her, and showed her what had happened. We called the police, and I got my friend steph's dad on the scene, he laughed at me and said it didn't look bad at all and the damage was not enough to warrant the police report. But I did want him as a witness to the damage, just in case. So I felt thoroughly stupid, but hey shit happens, and how often do you expect someone to park RIGHT behind you?

Then I went to Evan's grandma's and picked up an Ice cream cake she had bought us for our Birthdays. I had to cram it in the upstairs freezer since the big freezer is broken.

When I got home, I brought in my stuff, and the dogs, and saw that during the day SOMEONE (aka the grinches) had knocked over an entire flower box on the front porch, and dumped dirt (lots of it) into the dog's bowl, all over the floor, all over the dog's stuffed toys, and in the dog's water. And left it there. You have GOT to love men. They have NO follow through. At all. For example, the garbages that didn't get taken out on Sunday night, didn't get taken out all day today, despite the GIANT note in red marker. And the lid was left off the dog treats- AGAIN. Hey, why not make $3.00 of dog treats stale? Why not invite mice into the house?

Then, my favorite show, CSI Miami, was barely on tonight because channel 4 was crap, even through cable, and I could only hear every 4 words they said, and could only see about 30 minutes of it, on and off. CRAPOLA!

So I am watching Malcolm in the Middle reruns and then I am going to sleep. What a freaking day!

BROKE

What is the remedy, for doing the job of a web designer, when you are supposed to get paid $20-25 an hour, and only getting paid $13 an hour? What are you to do? I have been patient. I have been here for 3 years. I have shown them what I can do. I have three websites currently in design. What more can I do?

I am constantly getting offers from other companies. Two years ago the City of Peoria or Chillicothe emailed me and wanted me to head up their IT support and to do their web design. How cool is that? The reason I didn’t take it? Because I like my job and just didn’t feel like driving 2 hours a day for work. But it’s like, HELLO! DOUBLE THE SALARY! And it wouldn’t matter much if I had enough money to make ends meet. But Evan needs a new car and at this point, we don’t make enough to have two car payments, and mine isn’t paid off for another year, plus I have been doing the “get your ass out of debt” thing for like 3-4 years now, so that takes up money. But it’s like, what part of “I am being underpaid” don’t they understand?

I try not to think about it too much, but when I think that I could be designing websites for $20-25 an hour, and I am making half that, It sickens me. Not to mention if I double my salary for the last three years when they SHOULD have been paying me more. I would totally have a shitload of money, or be completely out of debt. Or BOTH.

So we are finishing up the living room and dining room (hopefully in the next month) and I want furniture so bad I can’t stand it. But we weon’t be able to get any because we have a wedding loan to pay off first, and I don’t make enough money to get things paid off fast enough. Granted, I could live a staunch life of no shopping, but I still need to have clothes to wear to work, and for god’s sakes, I shop and Wal-Mart, Target, and K-Mart. It’s not like I am wearing prada. We still have to eat and I have to keep my sanity with a hobby, like reading and scrapbooking. But it is just SOOOO frustrating to know that you should be, could be, making more money, and to just sit there for three years and wait. Patiently, until eventually you feel like you could SCREAM!

I love my job. I love my boss. I love the people that I work with. Really. But I don’t love the fact that I have to decide which bills can be paid and which can be “held off” until another two weeks when I get paid again, because I don’t make enough to make all the bills when they are due. How fun is that? And it wouldn’t be so bad if I hadn’t already been doing that for 5 years. UGH!

Of course, you feel the pressure the most around December, because of Christmas. Everyone thinks that you should participate in every little gift exchange, but it’s like HELLO! This is too much! I can’t afford to buy presents for 50 people! So this year the top secret project should help with the stress level. Oy.

PAY ME WHAT I AM WORTH!

Delightfully WICKED!

I am just going to throw a few tidbits out there before bedtime.

1. I am SOOOO angry at Grey's anatomy for what they let Alex do to Issy. It makes me furious.

2. My dog thinks it is funny to carry a dead mouse inside, hiding it in his mouth, and placing it sneakily on his bed. Oh well, I guess it could have been on MY bed.

3. Husband did not take the garbage out AGAIN and if it is still in the house when I get up in the morning I am dumping it on his head, dead mouse in plastic bag included.

4. I hate laundry. I have 16 loads done, 7 loads to go, no chance in hell I will get there.

5. I love ice cream, especially the new nestle vanilla that comes in a blue tub with a snap on lid so that it doesn't get all crystallized in the freezer. I ate mine tonight over blueberries, blackberries, raspberries, and strawberries. About time someone cared enough to seal my ice cream.

6. I shopped. Too much. On Saturday night. It felt SOOOOOO good but now I am SOOOOOO broke. Only have three people left for Christmas and then I am DONE!

7. Wicked the book is delightfully wicked. You MUST read this book. Forget Broadway. There is no way that this book is accurately portrayed on Broadway. It must be read and appreciated first.

8. Long nap this afternoon was awesome. Then I fixed a computer problem for Brad and Anya. Now I need sleep.

9. Looking to be a busy week, with Dog Shelter on Monday night, supper with mom to celebrate Evan's birthday on Tuesday night, Evan's birthday on Wednesday, and the Sears Freezer repair man coming on Wednesday.... I will really deserve the pedicure that I get on Saturday (*girls at work gave it to me as a birthday present!)

10. It's hell to get old. For the first time in my life, I only received 6 birthday cards. This is lacking compared to previous years, and I felt a distinct depression this year as an old woman. Maybe it was also encouraged by being unable to relax in my own house because it is all tore up, and knowing that the remodeling is behind schedule and we won't have a place to put a Christmas Tree. HOW CAN CHRISTMAS COME WITHOUT THE TREE?!?!?!?

God help us all. At least I am doing better off than the neighbor whose garage burned at 4:30am on Saturday, and than the people on Extreme makeover who have stage 4 cancer. Must stay positive. Lack of furniture and a christmas tree are MINOR details. But they sure can piss me off!

From this day forward, I will look at the contractors as grinches in disguise. Sneakily slithering my Christmas (tree included) out from under me in an attempt to ruin Christmas. I must get the who-mentality and remember that Christmas is not about decorations and presents. In the spirit of things, I went to the Website and got my who-name.... "Magnificant Meagan Jimeroo-Who" and Evan's is "Electrifying Evan Jimeroo-Who" (note that we have the same who-surname) And just to take it WAYYYYY over the top, I checked our the name of the who-canines, and Hadley is "Heckling Hadley Hula-hoo-Who" and Boyd is "Beekeeper Boyd Ballyhoo-Who" although I am positive that he hates bees. So go get your who name and keep things in the spirit of the holiday season. No matter who your grinch is...

They're WYSER because of it.....

Well, today was brunch at WYSE Guys to celebrate Thanksgiving. Coordinated by Evan's mom and involving Evan's Grandma Marie, Evan's Aunt Patti and Uncle Sean, and Evan's parents, along with my parents and sister... and Evan's brother Kyle, his girlfriend Becca, and her mom and sister also.

The food was great, which, let me stay, astounded us. Wyse Guys has okay food, it's just nothing to write home about. Nothing to work on dragging friends, out-of-towners, etc. - but they have VERY nice atmosphere, it is usually clean and comfortable. Now I have to say that I was thoroughly impressed. Chocolate Fountain! hello- fab! But also mimosas for breakfast, with melons, strawberries, bagels and creme cheese, french toast, cinnamon rolls, pancakes, sausage (GOOD sausage) and Bacon (GOOD Bacon) and then Eggs Benedict which was better than any I have ever had, and potatoes. And also lunch fare, such as tortellini, fettuchini, mashed potatoes with cheese and sour cream, soup, prime rib, green beans, WOW! Totally worth it. Then my mom and aunt pat got two of the giantest beer mug bloody mary's with a pickle, 3 olives, 3 cubes of cheese, and a cocktail shrimp on top! Wow. Evan's blue moon came in a mug with an orange slice, and Sean's Chocolate Martini had a big plump cherry. Now I know to anyone in a real CITY this is normal, but to us in Princeton Illinois, this is unheard of, like living the good life.

So WYSE Guys did fabulously, a first in my book.
Hope it stays that way!

LOSER.

Today at 3pm, Husband said "I'll be right back, I'm going to my parents to get a truck" because we had bad food from the broken freezer (see today's earlier post) that needed to be disposed of.

It is now 11:56pm. 8 hours later. No sign of husband. No phone call, no letter, nothing. Just vanished into thin air. He has not answered his cell phone, returned my call, or called out of courtesy to let me know that he is still alive.

In his absence, I have cleaned the kitchen and the bathroom. I have done exactly nine loads of laundry, hung it all up and put it all away. Ran the dishwasher, unloaded it, and reloaded it. Washed 8 pieces of stoneware by hand. Made supper. Let the dogs outside 4 times each, gave them treats, and put them to sleep on the porch. Changed the sheets and blankets on our bed and made it all up pretty. Vacuumed the bedroom, cleaned my closet, and put away my misc shoes. Taken down and packed up all the Halloween/Fall Decorations. Unpacked my new kitchen aid slicer/shredder and read the book. Checked the temperature in the freezer three times, watered all the plants, and visited with his brother and his brother's girlfriend when they stopped by for approximately 30-45 minutes.

What is it, do you suppose, that he found so riveting, that would take him away from our house for over 8 hours (without notice) and led him to believe that there was nothing for him to do here. No laundry, dishes, no outdoor chores consisting of winterizing, and no quality time needed to be spent with his wife. What do you suppose that is? Alcohol? Another Woman? His car upside down in a ditch? What is so riveting that stops his cell phone from being answered, and has prevented him from calling me? Hmmm..... I wonder.

Bureau Valley High School Football- Class 3A State Champs

Just finished watching the Bureau Valley Storm win the state championship in Class 3A Football. View all the final stats here. It was broadcast on the WB channel 26 and I watched the last two halves. Mom is there, I bet it was cold. The best part of the game for me was seeing Coach Dave Moore and his wife Judy interviewed, as well as Judy's son Garrett. Mr. Moore was my 6th-8th science teacher, my High School Biology Teacher, and our PE Teacher through my high school time at Manlius. He and Mr. Bourquin sold me my first pair of Chuck Taylors, scraped cinders from my leg when I wiped out on the track, and were generally just the guys that coached Manlius Football as long as I could remember. It cracks me up to see Garrett and Reid playing football as seniors, because I knew them when they were like 4, 5, and 6 years old.

I attended Manlius from Kindergarten-Junior Year, and graduated from Bureau Valley in 1996 as the first ever Senior and Graduating Class. Evan attended Western from Kindergarten-Freshman Year, Graduated from BVHS in 1998, BVHS's third graduating class, the last senior class in Buda, before the high school site was complete in Manlius. So Congrats to Bureau Valley.

Freezer crapped out.

Nothing is worse than when an appliance craps out. Except when you discover a freezer with $$ of food that has been defrosted and is beginning to get stinky. Luckily I decided to go down to the freezer today and get some ground beef... When I opened the door (chest style deep freezer) It was dripping water. Icky. Everything in it was soft and squishy and the bottom was filled with bloody water. All the meat (ham, hamburger, italian beef, roasts, cornish hens, fish, chicken breasts) was thawed and squishy. The bags of flour that I store in the freezer were soaked with meat drippings.

Evan got rid of everything while I called Sears. The freezer is luckily under warranty. It's a Kenmore model, and I have always had the best of luck with Kenmore... I won't buy anything else, especially not Amana/Whirlpool. We had a washing machine that was 5 years old that took a dump, and I was so freaking mad at Amana I could have stomped over there and strangled them (figuratively of course)

We have a Kenmore Refrigerator, Microwave, Dishwasher, Deep Freezer, and now a new Kenmore Washing machine.... I am super loyal to Sears when it comes to appliances, I learned that early on from my dad, and have stuck with it ever since. He is a craftsman man, through and through, and all my parents appliances have been Kenmore.

So, Sears has to charge us $65 to come over and determine what is wrong, and if it is in fact warranty work, we will get that $65 refunded. It was purchased in 2001 and it has a 5 year warranty on the free-on system and 10 year on the compressor... so hopefully everything will be fine. Evan wants to test it over the weekend, when it is empty, and see if it will freeze again. I am going to go down and put a thermometer inside.

Cross your fingers that we get this fixed under warranty and can restock our freezer. I don't suppose there is any way to recoup the cost of all the meat and food that went bad?

Hmmm....

Birthday is over. Now I'm old.

Let's start at the beginning. on my birthday I woke up at 8:30 am. Fabulous. Evan gave me my birthday gifts, wrapped in one of his t-shirts, in a grand presentation. I received a DVD (Charle and the Chocolate Factory) and three books (Frank McCourt, Jennifer Weiner, and the Wiked book) So it was good.

I talked to mom and dad and I won a $30 gift certificate on the radio for my birthday, from Chestnut Street Inn in Sheffield- Moroccan night. Then I took a bath. Then I forced Evan to get up at almost 1pm and we left for Mom's. Then we had to turn around because Evan forgot his wedding ring and we needed gas. Then we went to Casey's. Then we got gas, then off to mom and dad's. When we got there we opened a bottle of wine. Liz came, she gave me her present, an electronic game called "20 questions" that we tried to stump and successfully did.

We ate the traditional tasty turkey and trimmings. I opened presents from mom and dad. I got the slicer/shredder attachments for the Kitchen Aid Mixer, and a Zippo Candle lighter with refills, and 8 silver snowflake napkin rings, A First Christmas Together Ornament, a Snowflake Ornament Stand, Two snowman Ornaments for my tree.

Then we then all piled into the car and drive to the Quad Cities to the festival of trees at the Davenport River Center. We wandered around. There were some impressive wreaths. And some cute trees. I bought raffle tickets and entered them into wreath raffles.

Liz insisted that we get our picture taken with santa. Santa looked very afraid. After the photo op, Santa autographed our hands with red sharpie markers, then Liz told him that she wanted a 1969 Chevy Camaro for Christmas and Santa replied with a chuclke "A big block I suppose" and we all went on our merry way. We took lots of pictures but they were on mom's camera.

We drove home, left Liz in Mineral, and Evan and I went back with Mom and Dad to their house and we had leftovers. Then we watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Then We went home because I was so tired. Then I called Anya breifly and went to sleep.

Today is Friday. This morning I got woke up at 7:30am when a lady called looking for someone to take a stray cat off her hands. She had read my name in the paper as a contact for a friends of strays fundraiser, and she therefore decided that I must be the person to call at home at 7:30am on the day after Thanksgiving because no one answered at the shelter and she didn't want to leave a message. AAAHHHHH!

I took the day off work, and had an 11:oo appointment to work on the secret project. I got half of my money down, which was great. Now we wait for the final phase.

There is laundry piled to the ceiling. It is very hard to relax with that laundry looking at you, and no living room or dining room, and no furniture to sit on. I could sit on the bed but it is 12:48pm and Evan is still sleeping! UGH!!!!

Meagan's Booklist

The Widow of the South by Robert Hicks
Naughty Stories from A-Z (Vol 4)


Julia & Julia by Julie Powell
Teacher Man by Frank McCourt
The Man Who Talks to Dogs by Melinda Roth
A Thousand Days in Tuscany by Marlena DeBlasi
The Best American Erotica 2006
Juicy Erotica
The Divide by Nicholas Evans
Magic Hour by Kristin Hannah
The Tenth Circle by Jodi Picoult
Deception Point by Dan Brown
Digital Fortress by Dan Brown
Angels and Demons by Dan Brown
The Surrogate by Judith Henry Wall
A Clearing in the Wild by Jane Kirkpatrick
Bed Rest by Sarah Bilston
The Lavender Field by Jeanette Baker
The Childrens' Blizzard by David Laskin
Manhunt by James L. Swanson
Cover of Night by Linda Howard
To Die For by Linda Howard



Nerd Gone Wild by Vicki Lewis Thompson
The Linnet Bird by Linda Holeman
The Memoirs of Helen of Troy by Amanda Elyot
The Nerd Who Loved Me by Vicki Lewis Thompson
Gone with the Nerd by Vicki Lewis Thompson
Belly Laughs by Jenny McCarthy
Labyrinth by Kate Mosse
Son of a Witch by Gregory Maguire
The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown
The Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella
Talk Nerdy To Me by Vicki Lewis Thompson
At First Sight by Nicholas Sparks
True Believer by Nicholas Sparks
American Girls About Town featuring Jennifer Weiner
Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weiner
Wicked by Gregory Maguire
A Thousand Days in Venice by Marlena DeBlasi
Little Earthquakes by Jennifer Weiner

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Awww. Sheehan Couldn't make the Bitch, Uh no- I mean Ditch party.

Cindy Sheehan had a "family emergency" and couldn't make the Ditch party protest outside George Bush's Texas Ranch. McClean County Officers arrested a dozen protestors for camping along the roadside, among them was Cindy's sister. Read the entire article here.

Here's Your Chance to Kiss Me!

So the workplace officially leaked out the first Christmas Carol (overhead "music") last week.
Today we are in full holiday swing, and tomorrow is Thanksgiving.
The Workplace is Pimping the Holiday Season Already.

Well, If they are going to pimp Christmas. I am going to pimp the Mistletoe. I am posting my mistletoe early this year to see how many people would kiss me. So if you like to send me a mistletoe kiss in the spirit of the holiday season, leave a comment below. Every single year I hang up Mistletoe at my house. ONCE in 5 years my husband has kissed me under it. What a slacker. talk about un-romantic. I think my breath is okay. I am one of those obsessed teeth brushers, anywhere from 3-6 times a day I brush my teeth. I have toothbrush and toothpaste at work and at home. So please, feel free to kiss me and prove to husband that what a girl wants is a little something to blush about now and then, even if she is married.

S.W.A.K.
Neglected wife

P.S. Kisses from Girls welcome. (that's hot)

Breathe. Smile. Breathe. Smile. Breathe. Smile.

Remodeling.

At a standstill.

Worker attending multiple doctor visits in iowa city.

Floors- half sanded.

Walls-plastered and sanded.

Trim in Garage, not finished.




Left to do…. All by December 15th:
Sand living room floor.
Stain center square of living room and dining room floors.
Polyeurethane floors- 2 coats in each room with 1 day in between each coat for drying
Total of probably 8 days to polyeurethane. Must do one
room at a time or there will be no way to get in the house.
Primer Walls and Ceiling.
Paint walls and ceiling.
Put all Trim back up, must fit just so.
Touch up trim, last coat of stain and stain all doors and built in cupboards/pillars
Pick out paint color for trim between walls and ceiling.
Paint that Trim
Install that Trim
Hang all pictures etc.
Hang Curtain rods and Mini-Blinds.
Run Cable Coaxes and Phone
Lines.
Move Few pieces of furniture that we have back in.

If they work every single weekday from Next Monday on, that gives them 12 days in which to complete all of the above. Do you think that will happen? I don’t. I really don’t think that will happen. If it does happen, there is a likely chance that it will be half-assed and shitty work in order to get it done in time. Which will royally piss me off because these are the two most important and most seen rooms in the house. They are the rooms that I have spent TONS of time picking out new colors, a new paint scheme, and new art for the walls. This will make me very very angry. I am trying to not let all of these thoughts ruin my holiday season and my birthday.

Other things that I am trying not to be cranky about? The fact that I haven't parked in my garage since July. I have rolls of old carpet in my driveway. There are always half drank bottles of pop/cappachino/water in the house, on the window sills, on the scaffolding, etc. There is a giant red trailer taking up a heavy portion of our driveway. I can't park anywhere near the door without the workers parking me in, because you know they need to park closer to my house than me. It must be a rule. I can't walk around in my underwear because there are people there, and even when there aren't people there, there are no blinds or curtains. Oh and we haven't had lights in the main part of our house since the beginning of October. But these are all just parts of remodeling I guess.

Breathe. Smile. Breathe. Smile.

Same Thing We Do Every Night Pinky.... Try to Take Over the World!

Good morning Friends and enemies. Today my brain appears to be slowed. Instead of the usual overworked, overanalyzing, overacheiving brain, I have birthday/holiday brain. Now only a very few of us have ever experienced birthday/holiday brain. That is brought on only by the rare combination of having your birthday on a holiday. Many of you can undrstand the seperateness of “birthday brain” or “holiday brain”- but when they collide… only a select few have that pleasure. So, with brain on vacation, I am trying my best. It brings to mind that animaniacs song for pinky and the brain (listen to it here, for old times sake!). They're Laboratory Mice, Whose Genes have been spliced, They're Pinky, They're Pinky and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain!

Last night I worked till 5:30 at the “undisclosed location” and then I worked on a computer for a customer from 7-9:25 in their home. Although It was a totally great job, she made me a hot fudge sundae, and I still got to watch My Name is Earl while We did windows updates (damn dial-up)

Then at home I ate some supper and Evan came home and we watched Earl again, since I had TIVO’d it and Evan hadn’t seen it. Double Earls.

words strung together in nonsense paragraphs

Ever run across one of those blogs, or a person’s website, where they string nonsense words together and claim that they are poetry or art?

I think even I can accomplish art at their level. Let me try.

The orange sky stomps your lions name between the leaves and water kills her gift.

Or how about….

Feet on the ledge swim over the crisp papers of my mind, bringing despair to dinner.

Or we could get REALLY crazy…..

Microwaves drive snickers through my spotted heart. The pitcher burns each switch with a click.

WTF? THAT is ART? That sounds more like drugs and bad english to me! Grammer on Grass. That’s what they should call it.

Let’s see if we can randomly find examples from the web…..

Oh, this person appears to have written a whole book of what sound like drug induced ranblings of unrelated or poorly or overly descriptive words run together. Fun fun. For everyone.

Jeopardy Question of the Day:

Question?
Who is the owner of www.meaganjohnson.com and what is the future of that domain name?

Answer...
Meagan Johnson is the owner of the domain. She is a generation X Speaker who motivates and inspires. Her current website is www.zapthegap.com She has made meagan (me not her) very angry because she has my name. But I am sure I will get over it.

Jennifer Aniston is GQ's first ever woman of the year...

In an effort to spread culture into the brain of my husband, last year I bought him a gift subscription. All I ever see on the magazine racks at our house are magazines like Playboy, (and other much dirtier mags) and things like Maxim, FHM, and Playstation Magazine, Alternative press, etc. His mo bought him Wired, and we both read that, but I get really really tired of Maxim's silliness, like "How to outrun a bear" and "how to tie a tourniquet." How about How to do laundry and how to do dishes. And the stupidest article I have seen by maxim so far is "500 things women don't want you to know." 80% of which were either lies, thoughts of stupid whores, or ideas inside some man's head of what a woman PROBABLY is thinking. And we ALL know what that means. WRONG again.

So of course there were the usual complaints of the culture seeping from GQ. You know, men in expensive suits, advice on dress shoes, gadgets that the average (married) man will never afford or have approved by his wife, and the Articles, usually read by smart intellectual types. Oh and Did I mention well dressed men in peacoats and scarves? Where were the unshaven guys glued to the playstation in faded black metal band t-shirts with holes in the armpits? My point exactly. You are 26 this year, how abouts we act like it, eh?

So anyway, I always check out the GQ thing, and the new issue has Jennifer Aniston listed as the first ever GQ woman of the year. Tastefully topless, bikini clad, or wearing a mini skirt, her interview, her photo shoot, and SHE in general- is wonderful. She is so much better than skanky bad dye job Brad Pitt Deserves, and you can just already tell she is flourishing without him. Let him go squish himself onto Angelina for a while. Maybe next he can creep us out with scientology while jumping on a couch like Tom Cruise- who has, I believe, lost all respect and even loads of his fans. Poor Katie Holmes. Being taken advantage of by the older guy who should know better. How about you actually marry her, you loser.

The "man of the year" that I was horrifically shocked by- Kevin Federline. The interview with him portrayed him exactly as the masses see him. A slacker. Is it possible to feel SORRY for Britney Spears? Yep.

The kinky and twisted things you didn't know about Wonder Woman.

Did you know that the man who created Wonder Woman with his wife (WW was modeled after his wife and a woman who lived with them as a member of the threesome) also created the systolic blood pressure test, which later led to the invention of the lie detector? Dr. Marston was an active practicer in bondage and it is said that wonder woman was an outlet for his sexual fantasies. The connection is noticeable when you see how often wonder woman was tied up or in most cases how often she was tying up others. Princess Diana of Themyscira, known to most as Wonder Woman, was an outspoken feminist until the comic book industry established the Comics Code Authority. In 2005, Wonderwoman broke the “do-not kill” code of the DC Superheroes. While under the mind control of Maxwell Lord, Superman brutally beat Batman and engaged in a vicious fight with Wonder Woman, thinking she was his enemy Doomsday. After barely surviving the fight, Wonder Woman confronted Max, demanding he tell her how to free Superman of his control. Bound in her lasso of truth, Max told her the only way to free Superman was to kill Max himself. Wonder Woman responded by snapping his neck.

Marston said:
"Not even girls want to be girls so long as our feminine
archetype lacks force, strength, and power. Not wanting to be girls, they don't
want to be tender, submissive, peace-loving as good women are. Women's strong
qualities have become despised because of their weakness. The obvious remedy is
to create a feminine character with all the strength of Superman plus all the
allure of a good and beautiful woman."

Read all about wonder woman, from her inception to current times, at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonder_Woman

Phase Three of the Secret Project Begins....

Phase Three of our "secret project" begins Friday the 25th. Phase two was completed on Saturday, and Phase one was completed way back on November 4th. It looks like phases four and five are on schedule to be completed by Christmas! Yeah!

Books I want- And Thanksgiving is my Birthday (for real)

Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weiner- Having read In her Shoes, Good in Bed, and Little Earthquakes, I desperately want this book. I don’t want to pay for the hardcover and I haven’t seen a softcover version yet. This is a a must have book!

Wicked by Gregory Maquire- Having heard review on Wicked the musical, and watching the trailer, I really want to see it. BUT even worse, I need to read the book first. I have heard that the book is much darker and better than the musical, which is more “disneyish.”

Teacher Man: A Memoir by Frank McCourt- I have read all of Frank McCourt’s and Malachy McCourt’s Books, from Angela’s Ashes on. I love Franks writing the most, but enjoyed hearing the version from Malachy’s mouth also (even though I didn't believe him). I have them all in hardback, and would love to have this one in hardback as well!

Buddhism Plain and Simple by Steve Hagen- I am appalled at the fact that there are so many religions that we know nothing about. Christian faiths teach you to be blind to other religions and their beliefs and cultures, and I for one am sick of it. I want to learn about Buddhism and monks and absorb information from another culture for once.

The Nine Month Plan by Wendy Markham

American Girls About Town short stories by authors, including Jennifer Weiner

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• Books

Wal-Mart incorrectly charges customers in the midwest....

Wal-Mart is apparently in hot water over their "incorrect price" at the register. Their instances of incorrectly priced items when scanned is higher than the margin allowed by the federal government, and the midwest was listed as one of the two locations. Guess this is just one more reason to shop at Sullivan's! Check out the article HERE.

When Bad Movies Happen To Good Books....

Lately, I have been bothered by books that are made into movies. I have pretty much put up with it from adults. I know that we are busy. I know that we don’t have time to read as much as we would like. But most of the time people say to me “Have you seen (insert movie name here)?” and I say “no, but I have read the book.” And people are either like “oh.” Or often times I get “There is a book?!” or the ever favorite “They wrote a book about the movie???” No you freaking moron. They made the movie about the book because people like you were too lazy to read.

I love the harry potter movies. But I ADORE the harry potter books. Now I am slightly angry, because I see all of these GREAT books being made into movies. For those of us who have read the book, I find that exciting. But I also see the potential of so many people, children especially, neglecting to read because now they are all made into movies.

Take Narnia, The lion the Witch and the Wardrobe for instance. Classic. Will kids now refer to the movie and not read the book? Of course there is Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings. It makes me (always a dork, always loved to read) very angry, especially when the people who never read are suddenly like all into Lord of the Rings but never touched the books, and likely made fun of the kids who did read the books. Same goes for the Traveling Pants. EXCELLENT books. Not just for teenage girls! Fabulous! But will teenagers read those books now? How about East of Eden? Cider House Rules? Fever Pitch? The DaVinci Code? Midnight in the Garden of good and evil? You could even go as far to say Amityville Horror and American Psycho. What about the Aviator?

What about Walt Disney? Like Pinnochio, Alladin, 101 Dalmations, Alice in Wonderland? I mean it is unbelievable the books made into movies. I have always been the person who, when hearing that a new movie was made out of a book, runs to the bookstore to find the book IN PLACE of the movie. Then If I really liked the book, I will check out the movie. But if I REALLY liked the book I will boycott the movie at the risk of having a “Horse Whisperer” incident, where the ending of the book was completely commercialized and RUINED by someone who wanted to change the whole point of the story to make it into a movie. That is just WRONG.

It’s always been one thing to turn adult books into adult movies. But the increase of children and teen books being made into movies frustrates me. Why not teach your kids that reading is fun, and get them involved in books? Is it really better to make all of these into movies? Granted, we have fabulouse special effects and computer animation, but the best part of a book can be your interpretation of what a character looks like or sounds like, or what their house looks like. But in the case of most movies, they fall terribly short of your own imagination.

Check out this listing of books made into movies. It might amaze you to know what books you are missing! Read this article for other examples and viewpoints on bad movies happening to good books. And this chicklit message board with the same topic.

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• Books

A new twist in blogs....

I love Grey's Anatomy. I happened to stumble across something that I found kind of disturbing. The show has "blogs" for certain characters. Not for the actors that play the characters, but for the actual Characters. Like Joe from the Emerald City Bar and Nurse Debbie from Seattle Grace Hospital.

Two bits of irony here. First, if nurse debbie did really work at SGH, she would be restricted by the hospital's policies and would not be allowed to mention the following in her blog: Her place of employment, or the name of her employer. The name of her co-workers or bosses, anything that may be considered "hospital operations," and no patient information. And how about her mention of Dr. Yang as a patient? Dr. Yang has as much right to privacy as any patient, even is she is a doctor and a hospital employee. HIPAA would consider that a huge breach of patient confidentiality.

So what do you think about the fact that there are blogs out there written by characters? Are there more of these that I don't know about? Does Mickey Mouse blog? Does he link to Winnie the Pooh's Blog? How about Godzilla, and maybe King Kong?

TADA! Wonder Woman has Arrived!

Our new design is complete! Special Thanks to Ginger at Baby Jane Blogs for all her patience and hard work! This was a fabulous design collaboration! I had lots of fun and we turned out an awesome new blog template if I do say so myself! Please contact Ginger for a fabulous new design of your own. She is extremely reasonable, fast, and thorough. Yeah Ginger!

Chicago, Chicago.....

This is going to be a long post. I spent the weekend staying with my friend Angela (curly hair on the right in the photostrip) in Woodridge. She took me to Buffalo wildwings on Friday night, then to her workplace for a grand tour. On Saturday we went to The container store (Contain yourself!) and then to IKEA. I was overwhelmed with things to organize and decorate. I made some very nice purchases that will go well in the redecorated house.

Saturday night we drove into the city, to Logan square to Pete’s place. At Pete’s we had a few drinks and some appetizers, and we met his neighbors. We had a nice time, they were so fun! It was amazing because they had been roomates at college with a guy Angie and I went to high school with. And Kara’s parents had just purchased land outside of Walnut. Crazy. So then we went via the L to Feast on Damen Avenue for dinner. In true Chicago Style, our reservations were for 9:15 and we had to wait till after 10 to get our table, but we had drinks and talked about crashing bikes, etc…. so it was okay. Angela and I had fusilli pasta dishes and Pete had fish, I believe halibut. We had a bottle of wine and THREE desserts, Cappachino chip sorbet, Black Raspberry sorbet, and Pumpkin Cheesecake, that we all split. It was a great time.

Then we spent the rest of the night (till 2:20am) at the bar that must remain unnamed. After a walk to the 7-11 for cash for a cab, we found that the only ATM was Out of service, so we ended up buying something so we could get cash back. We bought Cigarettes, the people issue with Matthew McConahey as the sexiest man alive (about time someone other than me figured it out) and then a 5 cent piece of bazooka gum. We went to Pete’s until about 3:30am and then Tried to keep our eyes open on the drive home.

Sunday we didn’t get up till 12:30. Then we tried to track down massages but the place only had 30 minute massages for $60, which I thought was too much. We called all the massage places in the yellow pages, but they were either busy or not open, one place in Wheaton had openings, but kind of too many openings. We decided to do a drive by and it was in a TINY little house with another business and we saw no cars and all the blinds were shut tightly. There was a man on the roof. We just didn’t get a good vibe, so we went to Naperville for Lunch at NOODLES (Yum. We need one here!) and then shopped at Two Boston’s, a FABULOUS doggie boutique, and then to Barnes and Noble.

Beautiful Buddhist floating lanterns

I really enjoyed today's "week in pictures" on MSN. I had several favorites... but I really enjoyed the Buddhists releasing floating lanterns. First of all, it was beautiful. Secondly, I have always been fascinated by Buddism, especially the idea of Karma. Thirdly, It left me full of questions. Like "how do the lanterns float?" and "Isn't that a fire hazard? What happens when they land and start a fire??" Now I need to do internet research about all these questions. If you know the answers, or as intrigued as me, please post! I am dying to discuss the floating lanterns.

Then I found the coolest website, what other religion (besides southern baptists miraculously healing people for large sums of money) is so technologically advanced? I picture a monk sitting on the floor in teh middle of a huge empty shrine, wearing his robes with a laptop on his lap. http://www.buddhanet.net/

MORE INFORMATION (UPDATE) The lanterns are called Kohm Loy and operate like a mini hot air balloon. For more information on the festival, the lanterns, and their construction, visit http://sunsite.au.ac.th/thailand/special_event/yeepeng/

You (yes YOU!) are not invisible!

Zero Comments. Story of my life. It amazes me how many people are out there reading - I have stat counter, I can see you. I can see your city, your state, your Internet Service Provider, the company you work for (if you are at work) and your IP address. Then I can do a reverse lookup on your IP address and find out all kinds of goodies about you. I can tell how long you stayed on each posting, How you got to my blog, and what page you looked at last before you left the blog. I can tell how many times you have been here before and how long you have spent here total.

So you think I don’t see you, but I do! So comment damn it! Comment! Comment right now on THIS POST. I know you are out there. You can’t hide from me! YOU ARE NOT INVISIBLE! I can start naming names if you want. Bryce. Jackson. I know you are both silent lurkers. COMMENT DAMN YOU!

Scary MVA Dream.....

Today, I have tons I could blog about. Wow! I will start with my dream last night. It was strange and mildly disturbing. I was on my way to work on Rt 6 between Wyanet and Princeton, and I was following a semi with a hopper bottom, he was hauling gravel or sand. We were going like 50, there was a guy in front of us on a motorcycle. He was going slow. But he was screwing off. Every time the semi would get an opportunity to pass, the guy would weave into the other lane, or pop a wheelie, or something stupid. The semi kept having to get back behind the motorcycle. For some reason I had the feeling that the motorcycle guy might be Mike Judge Junior, because he has never apparently learned his lesson about how NOT to ride a motorcycle or four wheeler, and I have been behind him or been passed by him many times and watched him pop a wheelie and ride it for a while, or turn right in front of me without his turn signal on. But anyway, I could see that this was not a good situation, so I started to back off the semi, like WAY off. Then I see him get an opportunity to pass, he got almost halfway around the motorcycle, and the motorcycle swerved in front of the semi. The semi driver slammed on his brakes, as did I, and then his trailer slid to the left, off the side of the road. He tried to correct and next thing you know, his trailer is off the righthand side. Now it was hilly, more like we were between route 40 and Wyanet, but I know I was on my way to Princeton. So there were deep deep ditches on each side, like dropoffs, and the fields were hilly along the road. I could see that he was out of control, and that there was a damn good chance he wasn’t going to be able to correct the situation. I just backed way off so that I was almost to a stop, and a good distance away from the semi, and when the trailer left the road on the left one last time, it started to roll down the embankment and into the field. Now of course in my dream it was extremely exxagerated, it rolled and flew much farther than a loaded semi would in real life, but during the rolling I saw thr driver be thrown from the vehicle and by how far he was thrown through the air, I was sure he was dead. So of course I pull over and call 911 as I see the motorcyclist drive away like nothing happened. I got out of the car but I had a feeling that whatever happened with the wreck, not only did I not want to see, but It was probably dangerous, with the possibility of fire or explosion, and it wasn’t even 5 seconds when there were cars pulling over from everywhere. They were all getting out and standing in the road and blocking traffic. Pretty soon all of route six was blocked with standing people. None of them were witnesses, but when the police showed up, they were all trying to shout at the police and I couldn’t get their attention to tell them that I was a real witness and that I knew what happened and they needed to get the motorcycle guy. No matter who I talked to, they weren’t listening and if you know me, you know that I want everything NOW and I am not a patient person. That’s my downfall. So I kept waiting around and waiting around and I was like HELLO! TALK TO ME! I SAW IT! I NEED TO GO TO WORK! And suddenly they were selling concessions and there were politicians around and like the sheriff was there chatting with Bill Rosenow (mayor of sheffield) and it got all confusing. What a strange dream, eh? I remembered it twice this morning, once while putting on mascara and again when being stuck behind a semi on the way to work. What in the hell do you suppose brought on that dream??

Scrapbook Photos.... New!

Tonight I took pictures of the "scrapbook room." This is in half of our office. We just finished this room at the end of September. You can view 20 photos by visiting my layout at two peas HERE. I also made a bag book last weekend, and you can see 8 photos of the bag book and the pages inside it, at my two peas layout HERE.

News!

Today is suddenly the most EXCITING day! I received some GREAT news today. It doesn't involve me directly, but someone very very close to me, who I have known almost my entire life, has just told me some of the best news ever! I am so excited for her, I can hardly contain myself.

And it's still snowing! It's snowing Hard!

You'd think she was topless...

Keira Knightley had a recent wardrobe malfunction at the premiere of her movie Pride and Prejiduce. Now Firstly, if you read the MSN article, you would think she was topless. Good Lord do they exxagerate. It was just a teeny tiny portion of her nipple showing and they are having a freaking field day. Here are the pictures, See for yourself.

My first thought- Wear a bra. Duh. But obviously she doesn't have enough up top to even warrant a bra, which makes the whole "scandal" seem even more ridiculous. They are boobs! They are everywhere! half of us have them! Most of them are way better looking than hers! And in the pictures, I was so distracted by her overly bushy "too dark for her hair" eyebrows to even notice anything else. So maybe she has learned a few lessons. Wear a bra or SOMETHING (pasties for god's sakes) and probably pluck those brows.

Freak Occurances in Illinois

Things are STRANGE. Very strange. Firstly, in Illinois we had sNoW last night, but in southern illinois we had tornadoes. The collission of warm weather from the south and cold weather from Canada caused Snow in one part of the state, and tornadoes in another.

Then this morning, as I am reapeatedly snoozing my alarm and wishing to return to sweet slumber, I feel a tap on my shoulder and am like WHAT and I look up and Evan is standing there, plate in hand, and says "your breakfast is ready." What the heck is going on here? I feel like I have fallen down a rabbit hole.

So I had breakfast in bed, scrambled eggs with ham and onions, buttered toast with Mickey Mouse's face on it, and sausage. And bottled water. He even brought me a drink. AND he had the heater running in the bathroom to warm it up for me. Hmmmm..... what do you suppse is up with that?

It was a nice way to wake up, I have to admit.

We watched the news in bed with the dogs, and I got ready for work.

Today it is snowing (although not sticking) and it is strange to see my flowers finally dying outside (especially in my container plantings) and the leaves on the ground crusted with snow and sleet.

Today my good friend Jackson sent me a link that said Cindy Sheehan is planning a thanksgiving anti-war protest camping outside President Bush's Texas Ranch. New laws have been passed that prevent roadside camping, so the protestors are all expected to get arrested. I think some time in jail would probably do her some good. (see my previous Cindy post, if you want to know all my feelings.)

I watched Earl Last night, I love it. My favorite was the wedding cake that was tiered cake plates, and like Martha places cupcakes on the plates, they used Hostess Snacks, like Hostess Cupcakes, Twinkies, and white powdered donuts. It cracked me up. And then the whole liquor store registry. It's just too much. And when Crabman's kid decides to be potty trained, and earl is stuck in the bathroom with him, and he says "Old Daddy, Are you there?" It cracks me up. And I LOVED the scene with Joy getting pretty for her wedding in the park shelter bathroom, blowing the hand drier into her hair to get the 80's wings, and talking about sweating like a whore in church (with no offense to the whore that's in the room with her, because she don't go to church.) Plus when Crabman's sister comes in and squeezes Joy to her chest and Joy says "calm down tanisha, your gettin boob glitter all over my face." Priceless. Just priceless. Click Here To see a clip of last night's episode "I gotta fix Joy's wedding." See Earl's whole List here.

Excuses Aside....

I feel skinnier just thinking about excercising. Really. Well, at least I did before lunch. But when Cari and I ate Subway followed up with Pumpkin Pie Blizzards, that thinner feeling went away. It was replaced by a cozy "let's take a nice nap under a warm blanket" feeling. And the strangest thing about Subway is that when I leave there, I smell like their bread and onions the rest of the day. SO much for the fresh smell of Shampoo and perfume. Oh well. So if you feel hungry when you hang out with me, that's probably why.

Mom is going to let me borrow her treadmill, when we get the living and dining room done. Since we wil have almost NO furniture in the two rooms (A lamp, two recliners, and the Entertainment Stand) I will probably position the treadmill in the dining room looking at the TV. My goal is to watch TV and walk, as opposed to sitting on my behind. I keep wanting to go back to the metro center, but I have a few hitches in that plan.

First. I don't like gyms. At all. I don't like the other people there with their noses in the air, I don't like other people sweating on the equipment or the girl next to me who is a size two and runs on the treadmill for two hours while I get tired after walking 30 minutes. I dislike their parking lot where you have to walk through the cold to get to the door (hElLo! I am going there to EXCERCISE... do I really need to WALK across a huge parking lot in the cold to get inside?) I also dislike the locker rooms, changing in them, and all that. I mean, I didn't like Locker rooms in Junior high. In High School they didn't bother me because I was totally stacked and I had pretty bras and underwear and My tummy was flat and my legs were awesome and I didn't have anything to hide, in fact, quite the opposite. And I was with people I knew and loved... But now.... I don't want to be undressing in front of people I don't know, or even worse, people I know and don't like (like the size 2 from the treadmill.)

Plus I can't do it in the morning, because I would have to get cleaned up, showered and ready to go to work from the gym, and I can't even go for a weekend without a HUGE bag of goodies, and I don't need to be hauling luggage to the gym.... and I DON'T want to drive back home after the gym and then BACK to town to go to work. And if I did it at night I would have a window of about 3 weeknights when I didn't have to do something already after work, and I would have to skip supper and miss my house, my family, and my dogs. Not worth it to me. Is there any wonder that I don't like the gym?

I keep telling myself that with a treadmill at my house, I will have no excuse. Check back with me in 1 month to see what excuses I have come up with. My friend Cari says that I will love how many clothes I can hang on the treadmill. ha ha ha.

I have GOT to get skinny again. I can't buy more pants. I need to stay in the ones that I have. I watch TV and there are so many skinny people just zipping up their jeans normally that it makes me sad. I am tired of lying on the bed to button them and following up with squats and lunges to stretch them out. Ugh. I am tired of feeling guilty for eating stuffed crust pizza and pumpkin pie blizzards, and I am tired of gaining 50 pounds since I moved to in with Evan. Ick!

So I asked the husband if his parents have a spare equipment mat that we could borrow, or if I should buy one. His parents practically have a gym at their house. They are very weight conscious and excercise alot. I suppose that we look like fat people to them. I bet they can't begin to understand. Oh well. What do you do? Not everyone loves excercise. I have heard on the internet lately that fat is the new fad and that fat people will begin taking over as they are the majority. So bye bye skinny people, we are moving in!

GI Jane and why the feminist movement backfired?

You know, I have had something on my mind for a while now. I have an opinion (shocking!) that is just stuck in my brain. My friends and co-workers frequently discuss the stress involved with working full time, running a house, and raising a family. We often weigh in on what reason women had to start the feminist movement, and why it didn't work. I mean It worked, but it backfired. Seriously. I discuss this in many of my posts, whether it be in frustration or contemplation, and reading the book :the bitch in the house: has kept it freshly in my brain.

I often wonder if the feminist revolution was supposed to prove something. Was it just an agenda against the fact that women had no opinions, no right to vote, not voice? It is hard to believe that men thought that women's thoughts and opinions didn't count. I mean they were MARRIED to them for god's sakes. They had them raising their children, instilling values and behaviors into the next generation. How did we go from tough Pioneer women who worked alongside their husbands to the 1950's housewife? It's amazing to me because I think that a lack of women's rights was probably more the fault of certain weak and subservent women (you know them, and if you don't, maybe you ARE them!) than it was of the men. But at the same time, I also wonder if these homemakers were dying to get out into the world. Did they WANT to have jobs, work in factories or as secretaries? Did they strive to leave their homes just to be employees of a man other than their husbands? Or did they really see a bigger picture, where they would some day BE the boss, the CEO, the owner of their own companies and large corporations. I wonder.

But of course the dilema that we see now is women doing more than any one person should be expected to do. Work, Children, Housework, PTA, Girl Scouts, Soccer.... they become mom and don't have time to keep any sense of self- while their husbands are working and golfing and sitting in front of the TV. I can see the men out there "I don't do that" and All I have for you is either "thank god for you" or "you are such a liar" or "wow, that's some serious denial."

And it makes me think of the movie GI Jane. She busts her ass over and over and does everything the men do, and in lots of cases even BETTER than the men do. All to earn their respect and a place amongst them. But all the while, she is beautiful. She has a power over them already. But she wants to be accepted as one of the guys. She gets the shit beat out of her and screams at the men not to give up information. After all is said and done, Master Chief says that the problem has nothing to do with women not pulling thier weight. Women are pulling their weight and then some, everywhere. It has just happened right in front of their eyes. And it isn't that the women can't do exactly what the men can do, and more.... It's that the men can't change their perception of women. They won't come to accept what is right in front of them. This makes me feel better, and worse. It's really an astounding revelation. All from a movie?

It makes me feel better because I know that striving to be respected, to be recognized, to be accepted is not something I have failed at. I have succeeded and I will succeed over and over throughout my entire life. But it makes me feel worse, because I realize that no matter how many times I succeed, men will still perceive me as they want to. Because just like your mom told you, "men don't change." The fact that mom's words of advice pertain to more than just seeing dirty socks on the floor for the rest of your life- There is something scary and comforting about that at the same time.

I believe that women are constantly changing. They have different needs and desires. They have constantly changing goals and they are always striving to succeed over and over again. Part of this is brought on by not being seen as an equal. Men see this as "Women can never make up their minds" and "women change their minds so often we will never know what they want." And the irony of it all is that all that is true. We are complex and constantly changing. But one thing that men can be sure of... If they were able to accept women as equals, not constantly view them as objects, and see that women's jobs and chores are as important as men's.... and then come to terms with the fact that men can do housework.... They would already have us halfway figured out.

But since men will never change (my mom told me so) ... we never have to worry about men having us even halfway figured out.

One thing I can be sure of, I will be having the same "socks on the floor" argument till the day I die. I guess that makes life constant.

renovation progress!

Last night I went into the basement, and for the first time in 5 years, I dug out the swinging door that we believed went between the kitchen and dining room originally. It had been in the basement for a LONGGGGG time, like since the carpet was put in the house, and we had brown shag, so it was likely down there for about 20-30 years. I was worried that It would be water damaged and warped.... I was told we could put it up but the original hardware that was in the floor was gone, although the top pin in the doorway was still there. We could find a different set of hardware for the door but it wouldn't be original and it would mean drilling all new holes in the floor as the hardware wouldn't match up to the old holes. So I was estatic to find, when I pulled the door out, that it was in fine shape, not warped, and that the original hardware had been wired to the door and was still functioning! Yippee! I was so excited. I can't even describe! So today while I was at work, the original swinging door was re-installed between the kitchen and dining room. It's going to take some getting used to, but it really has it's pluses, and it looks FABULOUS! It swings and it props open, and it has CLASS. So tonight I wiped it down of all the cobwebs and dust and I just stood there looking at it and swinging it for a while. I would practice walking through it and then I would try to see if the dogs would push it open. I opened the door for Boyd, and after he walked through, I swung it shut after him and said "don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out." It's great. It will keep the dogs out of the kitchen when we are cooking, and keep the dog hair levels lower in there. I also like the fact that if your kitchen is messy, you just shut the door! And hey, at Thanksgiving, my biggest pet peeve is trying to cook and having 5 people standing in my little kitchen, so maybe the door will keep them all in the dining room while I cook. Usually mom and I are the only ones that need to be in the kitchen finishing up with rolls and gravy and putting things into serving dishes, especially since all the wine and appetizers and plates, silverware, and forks are already IN the other room. So The door is exciting. I could swing through it all night. What a great way to spend a friday evening! It isn't even 6pm, but since it has already been dark here for like THREE HOURS it seems SOOO much later! oh well. I should take pictures of the door, eh? They also used solvent on the floors today and got a good space scraped free of glue. Soon we will see sanding and primer coats on the walls!

Exciting!

Translations by Wife.

Today I could really choke Evan. at 8:07 I am all dressed, getting ready to leave the house. I have been awake an hour. I was TRYING to be at work at 8am, but it is 8:07 and I still need to go to the bank first.

I am in the bathroom, Evan, who has been asleep and is in his boxer shorts with every intention of going BACK to sleep, is standing next to me and he says "Aren't you going to do something about the dogs?" translation, you do all the work so I can go back to bed. What he really was saying to me.... "You go outside and stuff their hairy dog beds into their houses with your good black pants on, because I was supposed to do it last Saturday and haven't done it yet, even though I haven't worked more than 10 hours all this week and have slept till noon each day, and you have worked 40, plus you've had two meetings and installed a friend's computer. "

SO what I really said to him "No. I am not going to do something with the dogs"
and he said "Like you don't do anything with the dogs any morning" (translation by wife, "the dogs have stayed in the house on the porch all week because I am too lazy to step foot outside and put their dog beds in their houses like I was supposed to do last Saturday, and if you would just do it for me, like you do everything else around here, that would be great because then I could go back to bed.")

So I responded with "When you start getting up at 7am and going to work at 8am just like me, I will take the dogs outside when I leave for work."

Floors are Patterned! Check it out!

Interesting. A Spider on a Spider. I found this yesterday morning as I let the dogs outside. This (for those of you who are blind or just confused) is a halloween spider that has a real spider attached. It must be love. Can you imagine being a real spider and finding a giant sexy spider just sitting there? Wow. It must have been love at first sight.
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Yesterday, they tore up the carpet in the living room and dining room. The biggest road block is that there is GLUE under the carpet, stuck right to the hardwood floors, which we did not have in any other rooms, not even in the bedroom, which had the exact same carpet. So they are using a solvent to remove the glue and then they will sand. What a mess. But I am glad to see the carpet gone and pleased to see that this floor is patterned! Neat! There are wider planks running North and South in a square in the center of each room. Probably 3" wide planks (as in the front porch floor.) Then there are the smaller 1.5 or 2" planks (as in the rest of the house) that go in a pattern AROUND the big square of the center of the room. So the smaller planks run in a Square around the Larger planks, and meet in the corners in a mitered fashion. So each room has it's own "square," and the two squares touch together in the center where the pillars and built in cabinets are. Very cool. So I am very excited about finding something new and different. Photos below show the dogs helping me to showcase the glue covered floors. in the SECOND photo, if you look closely (through the glue!), On Hadley's RIGHT is the 3" wide planks, running horizontally, and on the left, is the narrower planks running VERTICALLY. It's pretty cool. Of course we believe that since the square of wider planks is in the center of the room, they may have done that to save money, assuming that you would always have an area rug in the center of the room, and therefore it would always LOOK like the whole floor was the smaller slats, but when you think about it, they just created more work for themselves by having to make the mitered corners and having to run it different directions. So I am not entirely sure they weren't trying their hand at art. At any rate, I will believe they were being crafty, because that's how it makes me feel. If they are different types of wood, the polyurethane will probably stain the two planks slightly different colors, which would be kinda neat, or not. Either way I am thrilled!

Times are Desperate....

So they always have these contests, :which housewife are you: and I am thinking to myself.... Which Housewife AM I? Well, I sometimes wish I were Bree, first of all she has her shit together and she is beautiful, but then I realize she has the whole cold appearance (although she isn't cold) and She rarely lets down her hair and is wild (except when under the influnce, thanks to George last week.) But I realize that I am more Lynette than anyone. Surrounded by laundry and dishes and demands, love my job but also overwhelmed. Creative and able to make anything work out, even in a pinch, and I can see myself as her even more when I become a mom. Then I have a friend who is more of a Bree than I am, her house is always SPOTLESS and she makes supper every night, but then again she doesn't do much for others (not that she is selfish), no volunteer work, etc. Then I have ANOTHER Friend who is Susan OVER and OVER again. Poor Me, Poor you, Poor us. If she put her whining into work, she would be unstoppable. I don't think I know an Edie.... at least not one that is my friend. Edie is usually the girl that is excluded from my circle of friends. And as far as Gabrielle.... Don't think I know one of those either. But I don't exactly live on Wisteria Lane, so there aren't many spolied rich women in expensive sports cars driving along in Wyanet. In Princeton, Maybe, But not in Wyanet. Have you ever noticed just how BEAUTIFUL Felicity Huffman (Lynette) is? They always mess her up for her roll on the show, but I tell you, at awards shows and in promotional photos, she is drop dead gorgeous. More so than any otherhousewife, in my opinion. But I have never been a huge fan of Teri Hatcher, and while Eva Longoria is exotic and beautiful, and of course sizzlin hot, she isn't that unexpected gorgeous that Felicity Huffman is. Although I have to say that Marcia Cross has beaufitul hair and her face is like porcelain! She's like looking at a doll! I saw her on Conan O'Brian one night a while back, in the green dress, and I was so shocked at how wonderful she is in person (or at least not in character, I mean) But overall Felicity is my choice for hottest housewife, and it's not just because she's Lynette- who I relate to the most. It also helps that she hasn't been plastered all over the cover of Maxim and FHM like Nicolette Sheridan, Teri Hatcher, and Eva Longoria. Plus her list of credits is substantial and impressive, especially with her theatre experience.

Mail to the ceilling! RaNt against the P.O. Box- the slacking of the US Government!

We had SOOOO Much mail today! Can I just say that one of the worst things in a world is a P.O. Box? And I don't mean a P.O. Box that you chose to have. I mean the "small town america 'If you don't get a PO Box, you don't get any mail' box" You small towners know that.

Your town is so small and the USPS won't pay a person to deliver the mail to your home, and usually their excuse is that a rural carrier has to drive right past your house to be able to have a mailbox in your yard. That means that the rural carrier would have to drive by your house on their way out of town. Yet for some reason, in Wyanet, all the people on Walnut street, and on King street, have mailboxes. Now here is the scoop. Walnut street doesn't GO out of town, it just leads back to King street. So the rural carrier is essentially going up that street "extra" to deliver mail. How does that follow their supposed policy??

And there is also another street (which I can't name by name) that runs in front of the park and crosses king and walnut, where there are also persons receiving mail by a rural carrier. Now here's the other deal. I live on the corner of North Street and Wyanet/Walnut. (yes, come and get me, I know I am asking for it. But be advised I have two very large and mean dogs, a husband with a gun, and I know judo.) Because my house faces North street, I have that as an address. Now the kicker is that we have a driveway on Wyanet/Walnut AND A driveway on North Street. EVERYONE on Wyanet/Walnut has their mail delivered to their house.

But I am not allowed to have a mailbox on Wyanet/Walnut without the permission of the person on Wyanet-Walnut, because the mailboxes are ACROSS the street from our house. So I asked the lady across the street one day, nicely, if she would mind us putting a mailbox next to hers. I even offered to purchase the exact same box as hers so it would look nice, and to do all the work, and landscape around the bottom of it like hers is so it would look nice. She said, and I quote "I don't like the way mine looks in the yard so I am sure I wouldn't like it even more if there were two mailboxes there. I am afraid my answer is no." OH MY GOD was I angry. I tried my best to stay cool. Overall she is a nice lady and her daughter and granddaughter live next door to her, also just across the way, and they are also super nice, but this was in my opinion, a little too anal. I could not believe her answer.

The other thing is that the AREA where her mailbox is sitting is technically along a county blacktop, and is the property of the county as it is in the right of way. So, I asked the post office nicely if I could put a mailbox in my own driveway, and the nice rural carrier could pull into my driveway to deliver the mail. They said no because she would have to back OUT of the driveway which is a hazard in her job that they avoid if at all possible. I thought about asking if she could BACK into the driveway, and then she could pull out forward, but I suppose Backing into the driveway would be a hazard, eh?

So the post office window opens at 8:30am and closes at 4:30pm. If I work from 8am-4:30, and the window is also closed for almost TWO HOURS over lunch, when will I make it in to the post office? If I have a package, I often have to go in on Saturday, and I have to get up EARLY because they close at 10:30am on Saturday. What Kind of CRAP is that?? So I may not get my mail for 6 days while it sits inside, because a package won't fit in my PO Box.

Then there are the 50000000 million papers that I have to fill out each year to prove I am not some terrorist living in Wyanet with a PO Box. Last time I had to give them the VIN number on my VEHICLE! How insane is that? They fell just short of asking for fingerprints, urine samples, and blood tests. I mean for god's sakes, I DON'T WANT A FREAKING PO BOX! I want my own mailbox by my own freakin driveway, and I want you to DELIVER my mail because THAT IS WHY PEOPLE PAY YOU MONEY FOR SHIPPING AND STAMPS! TO DELIVER THE MAIL TO MEEEEE! Not to hold it in your office and make me come get it. How well would UPS or FedEx do, if everytime the package is supposed to be delivered they just called you up and said "your package is here, come and get it!

No WONDER the Government is losing their ass over the post office. They don't even DELIVER the mail anymore. This is a far cry from the pony express, let me tell you! What happened to rain or shine, sleet or snow? Seriously, how long would it take the rural carrier to deliver mail to a town of 500 people? An hour? Maybe Two? Not to mention that there are practically 2-4 in every house, so they are really only going to make about 150-250 stops, all right next to each other, and they wouldn't even have to get out of their car? This has been pissing me off for FIVE YEARS and I am just now getting to vent about it. Is there a solution? I feel like writing to congressmen. I feel like contacting the President of the USPS. I feel slighted. Cheated. And at the chance of hurting the feelings of the many gypsies who may be reading this- GYPED!

Thanks!

Penne- today the puppets came! I was excited! They are SOOOO Cute!~ I can see these coming in handy. I need to read the little book that came with and I will be set! Thanks so much! I will keep you posted!

and Tina! I got the trivet! Ohh La la! It's beautiful! Now if I can just get my paws on a dining room table.... The dining room is coming along... The walls are mudded and taped and when they get all the coats on them they will primer them and then pull up the old carpet to sand the floors. And Tina, I totally need your prague address! How am I to send you a thank you card in Colorado? He he.

Thanks ladies, for making my morning! I usually only go to the Post Office like once or maybe twice a week and my PO Box was overflowing!

I have a Secret....

I have another secret! Oh do I ever! I am so excited I can hardly take it! I am more excited about this than about My birthday and Christmas Combined!

I met a new friend. I love her already and she has only spoken like 15 words to me (okay, maybe more like 100.)

Let's just say, things will change soon and I can not wait!

Are you curious? Even the least teeny-tiny bit curious? Okay then, here's a hint....

:) Meagan

P.S. For those of you who are CONFUSED (like Jackson, and a few others) I am not pregnant. Baby Jane Blogs has nothing to do with babies. Ginger (Jane's mommy) is a blog designer. That also has nothing to do with babies.

Thanksgiving is my Birthday....

Well, my birthday is coming up, and so is Christmas. Every year My mom asks for my wishlist, sometime in October, and I finish it up and give it to her. This year I discovered that I can make a froogle wishlist. How cool is that? A wishlist that spans the entire internet? Fabulous. So for the past few days I have been creating a froogle wish list, that has the things I would like to have all on it, with photos and links to buy them. Awesome. Wanna See?

Meagan's Froogle Wishlist

Your Blog Should Be Red

Your Blog Should Be Red

Your blog is full of intensity and passion. You are very opinionated - and people love or hate you for it. You have the potential to be both a famous and infamous blogger.

What Color Should Your Blog or Journal Be?