The Best Things in Life Are Not Free!

Today I am filled with pet peeves. For example, WHY Does a newspaper automatically think that if they print something, I want to read it? Why do they assume that if they print a free newspaper, that I want it tossed out in my yard amidst the dog shit so that I can fish it out and peruse it? I am the new generation. I don't give a shit about news that's two days old and media prejiduced. I can get more news, more unbiased facts, more interesting opinions, from the internet. From Blogs. Not to mention that I can read said newspapers online and save all that paper and those tiptoed steps through the dog shit to get the damn paper. The News Tribune prints a free paper called the Shopper. After the first 2 years of picking the damn thing up off the yard, we called them and asked them to please stop delivering. Well. That would work. Until we got a new paper delivery person (aka child labor) and then it would start all over again. Until the one day that we had my friend Carrie's dog Molly Brown and she went out after that paper boy (of course she has never really BITTEN, she was just defending her poopy yard) and he never came back. It was a miracle. So then, after the Shopper Incident, the Sheffield Bulletin went out of business andbecame "The Prairie Review" which, THANK GOD wasn't thrown on the lawn but delivered for free in a precise and civilized manner via the US Postal Service. This, I appreciated. A clean paper that has small town news and was free. Without the "our town is so wonderful we only print the BEST news and the quaintest of stories" bias that you get elsewhere. And then of course that paper became a "purchase me" paper and then next thing you know there is another free paper, The FOCUS printed out of the same town, with similar news and more typos, and still, miraculously, they manage to deliver it TO MY POST OFFICE BOX for free. I love it. But between these two free papers, the Bureau County Republican decides that they need to make a free paper. And toss it in the yard. Yes. In the Snow. In the rain. In the poop. Does a person who works full time want to spend their precious free hours picking up soiled newspapers from their yard that they didn't even ASK for? Apparently not, as the 34 free papers have piled up in the yard and on the steps. So today I called the Republican to get them to STOP tossing it in my yard. I was polite, until the lady said "We will put in that request and SEE if we can stop the delivery.... (argh) and then got all cranky with me "You're Breaking Up I can't hear you" (from my home phone) and I said very clearly

"THERE ARE THIRTY-FOUR OF YOUR DIRTY PAPERS IN MY YARD AND I BELIEVE IT IS ONLY COMMON SENSE THAT YOUR DELIVERY PERSON STOP THROWING OUT PAPERS ONCE IT BECOMES OBVIOUS THAT NO ONE IS READING THEM. PLEASE MENTION THIS REQUEST BECAUSE IT'S JUST COMMON COURTESY"