Friends Don't Let Friends Wear Crocs

Okay. So Crocs. I have to say I am not a fan. I don't (usually) look down on someone for wearing them. I work in healthcare so I see lots of them. But this one time, when I saw this chick at Wal-mart with orange crocs, pink sweatpants, and a red t-shirt, I cringed mightily. I just. can't. do it. But then people everywhere say "they are SOOO comfortable." and "pregnant feet love them!" and I am like NO NO NO. And Every time I see them in the store I think "I should try them on." and then I force myself to turn away. "Do not look directly at the crocs." They will suck you in. I can't try them on. What if I DO love them? I will turn into one of those sloppy croc wearing folks. they are like only a half notch up from those sloppy birkenstock with white sock wearing folks.

But then I am searching Zapos and Kohls and Payless online for stupid shoes and they have NOTHING! What the? I might as well wear crocs. They actually look BETTER than all the other shoes they are selling. Good God! What is this world coming to?