I have felt kinda crappy today. Just all around. Mentally cranky, my stomach has been crampy (or should I say my general stomach area, not so much my stomach as my belly.) and I am just not thrilled. I have accomplished a few things, but it feels like I have 5 bazillion things to do still because the house is suddenly a mess. I went through four totes of boy clothes and sorted into sizes from NB-18 months. Then I removed tags and stickers and washed everything that is NB and 0-3 months. I also did a load of jeans and two loads of diapers, and hung up a load of good clothes.
My heartburn has been just over the top the past two nights and days, and I have spent lots of time sitting up and awake. I was awake from 4:30 till 8am this morning, and that was NOT fun. I listened to Evan snore, ate some cereal, and then played some Touchmaster on the DS. Of course I FINALLY got back to sleep just after 8am and at 9am MIL was calling and I just wanted to put the pillow over my head. Luckily I was able to sleep till about 11:30, Ardyn was up at 11 but sitting in her crib happily reading. She didn't decide it was time to get "up" till 11:30. That was good. Despite Prenate DHA Vitamins that have stool softener, I have just had that icky slow digestion feeling and tummy cramps and heartburn. Ack. Today my OB let me know that I can double my heartburn medicine, and if it doesn't take care of it, I can then triple it, and if that doesn't do the trick I will be moving from Zantac to prescription. The fact that I can't sleep and that I spend the night upright and still throwing up in my mouth, is already very much like my last pregnancy, and I am JUST NOT DOING THAT again. Nope.
Ardyn has been checking her boundaries and getting into all the places that she isn't supposed to get, and to be honest, I am running out of places to hide things. I think I need some cabinets and drawers with child locks because this crap of just emptying every single drawer is starting to fray my last nerve. I keep the door shut to our bedroom all day, because her new thing is unloading the jewelry armoire, specifically the drawer with lapel pins. Yep. Luckily she brings them right to me to show me how fabulous and pretty they are, but I get so annoyed with it, and with her ransacking my nightstand that I just try to keep the door shut. I feel like it would be nice if I could at LEAST still own my own nightstand. Personal space is scarce these days around here!
Ardyn and I should probably consider taking a bath tonight, but I am feeling icky enough that I just want to put her to bed and take my own damn bath. Alone. By myself. Alone.
By the time she gets tired, and I get all of her toys picked up, and take a bath, I am pretty sure we might be looking at a midnight bedtime. Ack. I wish I felt like cleaning the kitchen. I spend every day looking at the stuff piling up on the tables in this place and I think.... I just need Ardyn to go to grandma's for a weekend so that I can get something DONE. But then I think I could get it done with her here (I think) and ship Ardyn off to do something fabulous like get a massage or even paint my own damn toenails. Ha. After a nice weekend I have been promptly slammed back into reality. I think what bothers me most is that after a weekend of answering to no one but my damn self, I am back to being at everyone else's beck and call. I don't think that my husband gets that, or will ever get that. He is always wanting to show me things. I am trying to get myself dressed, or make Ardyn and I something to eat, or pick up this or that, or go through baby clothes, and I am CONSTANTLY being interrupted with "look at this" and while it would be nice to have unlimited time to sit with my husband and look at things online, or in catalogs, or in the newspaper.... I just DO NOT have that time. I would prefer to hav a shirt on or eat a piece of toast! Is that so damn wrong. And when I spend 45 minutes saying "hang on please" and he just keeps asking, and interrupting what I am doing, I get SO FRUSTRATED! and what really makes me angry is that when we have the opportunity to spend time together without Ardyn, he disappears. Gone. Band Practice. Out with Friends. Running to Wal-Mart. Anywhere that leaves me hear with Ardyn sleeping. Not that I mind a bit of time to myself, but that usually is spent either picking up toys, doing laundry, or if I am lucky putting away my own clothes or watching a show I have on TIVO. But don't disappear every time I have some downtime and then expect me to ignore the fact that I am 5 months pregnant and STARVING to look at a shirt that you saw online. Seriously. I love him. To death. But I just wish he would get a CLUE that sometimes I don't want to be at everyone else's beck and call. I suppose that's what all SAHM's want.
Maybe I am having a midlife crisis, eh? LOL. My 30th Birthday is on the 24th of this month. RAPIDLY approaching. Or maybe I am just frustrated that as fast as I am sorting boy clothes into totes, Ardyn is unsorting them and unfolding them into massive piles on the floor. And no one but me seems to even NOTICE.
Today I took a few videos of Ardyn. My favorite is of her counting the sugar cookies (counting to three) and making animal sounds. I will try to embed it here....