In 5, 4, 3, 2.......

Being pregnant makes you do strange things. And the closer to your due date, the stranger and more urgent these things become. In the last two or three days it has been my goal to seperate out medications... our apothecary jar has medication for both toddlers and infants, and I am incredibly paranoid that someone will give the wrong kid the wrong medication, so I decided to put Ardyn's medication in her closet up high, and Marek's in the apothecary jar in the nursery. So I need a container to put Ardyn's medication in, and I always see those locking ones at the One Step Ahead Website, but seriously, the caps are ALL Childproof, it will be higher up in the air than she can reach and she won't be able to climb to it, and what parent wants to get up in the middle of the night and go through a locked box AND childproof caps to try to medicate a sick child? I can barely see straight enough to make sure I get the right doseage, let alone unlock a stinking lockbox to get the medicine. I can already see that if that was the case, the medication would NOT be in the lockbox where it would belong, therefore defeating the purpose. And I have already taught Ardyn that the medication is just that "MEDICINE" and that only moms and dad's touch the medicine spoons and the bottles. I'm not saying I am leaving them unattended, but she knows just the same, and I keep them out of her reach.

So now that I know where I am going to put them, I have a picture in my mind of the exact handled snap top tote that I want to put her medication in, and I want to go to Wal-Mart RIGHT NOW in the pouring rain, with no gas in the van, just to get that $3 tote that will fit all of her medication. LOL. Seriously. It's like the most intense nesting drive. I must. Have. That. Tote! It's that feeling of wanting everything "perfect" before the baby gets here. This morning I revised Ardyn's list of medications and doseages (I keep one typed up for reference) and also the Emergency Contact List with her physician's information (office/on call) and with all her family member's information. Then I laminated them all and made little information squares for each diaper bag, one for the medicine container, and another for the fridge. It's uber-preparedness at it's finest.

So we are scheduled to get 6 inches of snow (4-8, depends on who you listen to) by sometimes tomorrow, starting at about midnight tonight. My midwife has always told me that if there is a blizzard or a tornado there is always an influx of babies being born as the mom's bodies adapt and react to the weather. Just look at all the babies born during hurricanes! I figure that with my luck (oh and my condition) that there is a chance that I could be nearing labor. With my due date only 5 days away, I texted her (my midwife) this morning and asked if she was ready for an unexpected run on baby catching. I also told her that I am hoping to hold Marek in until March goes "out like a lamb." LOL. Her text back let me know that the weather was on her mind too.

It's strange, because I feel very motivated to do mental things, but not physical things. I should be in the sewing room, but that would mean I would have to walk down, turn on the heater, get things all ready, and sew, and that seems like SO much work suddenly. Why is that? Perhaps it's because both Evan AND Ardyn are napping (and have been for about an hour) and I am the only awake one in a completely silent (except for Evan's snoring and Ardyn's coughing spells) house, that is surrounded by the pitter patter of rain on the windows and roof.

Last night I was sweating alot in my sleep, but Ardyn kept waking herself up coughing (and me) and at 4am it was the gagging, can't catch my breath cough, so I went and got her, gave her sips of ice water, and then a cough supressant. She said "Change my butt" and so we changed her diaper and then she came into my room where she spent the next two hours alternately kicking me and cuddling with me, and insisting that her head be on MY pillow and her body halfway on top of mine. She has this way of "half spooning" that she does where the side of her face must touch the side of my face on the pillow, and I must then rub her hair or her face or her arm or back while she gets every inch of her as close to every inch of me as possible. She lays her back on top of my shoulder and chest, and cuddles up as close as she can. She must have her dog in one hand and a very soft blankie at the appropriate chest level. Now that she differentiates between "mommy's" pillow and Ardyn's pillow, and "mommy's" blanket and Ardyn's blanket, she will throw hers aside and declare that she needs to lay on Mommy's pillow and Mommy's blanket. Luckily we both slept from 6am till about 9:30am, when I heard her and woke up to her sitting next to me with her butt on her pillow, grinning. Now instead of saying "yes" to something (I think she has only said YES once to me) she cheers "YAY!" So she said she wanted a drink, and when I appeared with milk and cheerios, she said "YAY!" and when I turned on the TV so I could wake up slowly while she ate and entertained herself, she said cheered "YAY TV!" LOL.

Today while we were waking up, I was crocheting Marek's baby blanket, and I said "What's this?" and she said "Blanket! Beeeautiful!" Ha ha. (she's never said Beautiful before that I have heard) and then I said "whose blanket is it?" and right away, very seriously, she said "Marek's." Then later on she was telling daddy that the toys on the bouncy seat were "Marek's" and when we were getting dressed in the nursery she asked "where's Marek?" and looked out the window by the crib. I told her he's not here yet but he will be soon. She recently loves to talk about how he will have "tiny feet" and a "tiny nose." I can't remember if I mentioned it, but earlier this past week she and I were talking and I asked her what Marek would eat, and said that he wouldn't have any teeth and she looked at me with a mixture of confusion and horror (What DOES one eat without teeth?!) and then I said "Will he drink Mommy's milk?" and she got a HUGE Grin, leaned right in and acted like she was going to latch on to me (we were in the bathtub together,) and made a sucking sound, a big swallow, and let out a big, refreshing gasp... "Ahhh, nummy!" (her version of yummy!) like she just took a big drink of mom's milk herself. I love seeing moments of her remembering things like nursing. I love seeing how nursing is absolutely natural and normal to her, and in her mind. It makes me just glow inside. The innocent look on her face that goes along with that understanding is totally priceless.

Every day I become more and more confident that she will be the absolute best big sister she can be, and that she will be helpful and excited about Marek's arrival.

Yesterday we received an awesome and unexpected gift in the mail from our friends Wanda and Roger in the St. Louis area. Roger and my dad worked together for years, and are good snowmobiling buddies, and Wanda and I connected via the internet several years ago and are able to keep tabs on each other. She sent some super cute things for Marek. I took pictures and hope to upload yet this weekend. She also sent some things for Ardyn, who was SOOOOO excited I thought she was going to explode. She loved the curly pink ribbons and the pink gift bags and the tiny bunny and cupcake card, before she even SAW what was inside the packaging. She got a cute Dr. Seuss Board book and *gasp of total excitement* Three Dora the Explorer Figures that she is permenantly attached to already. I was going to take their picture but she HAD to have swiper with her while she napped today! The figures are Dora with her backpack, Boots the Monkey, and of course Swiper the Fox. All last night she had them lined up on the coffee table, and this morning they made their way into our bed. She just adores them. Perfect Gift! Thanks so much Wanda (and Roger and family!) We love everything. I think the little Jittery car in brown and blue is my absolute favorite. Evan said that the car things made him think of Grandpa Dave. LOL.

Another thing I want to be doing is hoarding food. Food is so damn expensive! We just can't seem to keep enough of it in stock around this place. I have been in the hoarding mood. When I get to a store I buy things like Nut-filled energy mixes, and dried fruit mixes, and pringles (my newest craving) and things that I can snack and munch on. I am really starting to remember the early days of breastfeeding (okay, wait, all the day sof breastfeeding) where I just COULD NOT get enough to eat and I kept eating and eating and kept losing and losing weight. I am thinking that I might starve to death here, with a toddler and a nursing infant. So if you come to visit, bring snacks. I'm good for anything! Crackers and Cheese! Veggies and Dip! Brownies. (I love me some brownies!) and granola bars, pop tarts, cans of soup, pretzels, etc. I am really feeling like I should have like CASES of food stored up, and I have 5 days left and no food in the house. After I had Ardyn, I remember seeing "a baby story" on TLC, and this mom had hired a Doula, and the Doula came to her house after the baby was born, and MADE HER SNACKS! All the time! Like little cups of applesauce, and sliced fresh veggies with dip, and tuna salad with crackers! She put everything into little containers like you would be packing your lunch for school.... and then whenever the mamma needed a snack, the doula had already prepared all these goodies. I was like "WHAT?!" Do all Doula's do this? WHY Did someone not tell me this? THIS is what I needed. I needed someone to feed me. That bitch was eating fresh veggies and dip and I was surviving on peanut butter and jelly and ramen noodles!

I will never ever forget the people who brought me food. Evan and I still talk about meals that other people brought in when Ardyn was new. Grandma Moma's meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Mmmm. Anya brought me stuffed peppers that were to die for, and spaghetti pizza with Garlic Bread. My mom brought over food. I just loved the food bringing people. Yes, hold the baby while I EAT! LOL. I am a little concerned about what we will eat this time around. And I am already thinking of my first post-baby meal. When Ardyn was born my mom brought me a Tornado from the Spaghetti Place. And I am already craving that. I am craving the ability to call someone and say "BRING ME _______" and not have anyone question that I deserve a damn good meal of whatever I want.

All this food talk makes me hungry.... I'm gonna go to the fridge and break me off a piece of Evan's Kit Kat Bar. Chocolate in this house is fair game when I am pregnant. I don't care who bought it or what the purpose was. Pop, Chocolate, and Ice Cream are not to be left unattended here. Even attended, you are taking your chances.

Well, once Ardyn and Evan wake up, I am pretty sure we are going to visit his parents. That will get me off the hook of feeling like I should be DOING something on this rainy day. And maybe they have more food than we do. (Who am I kidding, everyone has more food than we do!)

take care. I will keep you posted! Even if I can't update on the blog, remember that I have facebook mobile, and that facebook is likely the first place you will hear/see any news!