Whirlwind Woman

This morning I was like a freakin' whirlwind. Evan had been up until 4:30am, working on reports for work, and I woke up AT 4am when the Beeb decided that it was daytime playtime. I heard her in her room, in the dark, giggling and squealing, laughing, kicking her feet... just having an all over wonderful time. I got her up, fed her, changed her diaper, fed her some more, and she went to sleep with me in the glider in the nursery. I knew that I needed to go back to sleep, but I was feeling pretty awake then, I had about 4.5 hours of sleep already, and her little body was all curled up on me and she was so sweet and so cuddly... I just didn't want to put her down. I really wanted to just take her into bed with me, but I knew that I needed to put her back in the crib and foster her independence. Then Evan and I peeked at the mail, which he had just gotten, he had assembled the breast pump pieces from the sterilizer, and we went to bed. At about 4:45am the Beeb decided that she wanted to still be awake, and putting her pacifier in and patting her butt wouldn't do the trick, so Evan brought her into bed with us, and she lay all curled up between us, facing me and holding my hand. If I hold her hand, she will go to sleep so soundly, and stroke my knuckles with her fingers. So we both fell asleep holding hands, and this morning at 7:30 when the alarm went off, she barely even stirred. Instead of waking her with me as usual, I decided to let her and Evan sleep and I got myself ready. Around 8:30 she woke up on her own, and I fed her, changed her, dressed her, and then went out to start the vehicle and pack everything up.

I finished cocoa cones last night and had about 15 left to deliver, so I packed those all up in the candy cane basket that I wove back in December of 2001 (see photo above!) I got the breast pump, cooler of bottles, my purse, the diaper bag, the cocoa cones, and my grocery and to-do lists all in the vehicle and then Evan helped me load Ardyn up and we were on our merry way. After dropping her at school, I decided to grab groceries before work... we needed toilet paper and toothpaste, bread and milk... and I had to get 5 more Christmas Cards because people who thought we were unworthy of cards as young adults seem to think that now that we have a child, we are worthy. So that increases my Christmas Card list from 52 to 57. That is even without sending cards to all those people who I sent them to in previous years and who ignored me, until about 5 years into it, I decided to stop sending, and now that we have the Beeb, they have suddenly started sending one. Uh. No. Sorry. Not happening. YOU are officially OFF the list!

Of course when I got my entire cart FULL of groceries, and got to the checkout, the debit card wouldn't work. We deposited the paycheck yesterday but apparently it hasn't fully posted yet, to the debit card. So of course here I stand in line, with three people behind me, a cart loaded with groceries, and no way to pay for them. Ugh. So they suspended the transaction and I will have to go back later tonight and get them. Oh Yay! At least we will have toilet paper and bread.

After work tonight the plan is to go to the video store and rent some movies, make a nice hot supper, and then all three of us cuddle up in bed and watch movies as a family. I am so super excited about that, it was Evan's brilliant idea, and I know it sounds insanely boring to some people, especially those without babies, but cuddling with her and making her laugh, squeal, and giggle, is our favorite pastime. Last night she was really talking up a storm with me, squealing and giggling and being so cute and funny. She is practically perfect in every way.

We are both really looking forward to Christmas with her. This Saturday the 22nd is the "anniversary" of our Big Fat Positive Pregnancy Test. It was 12 days past ovulation and I can remember it like it was yesterday. It's a moment that we waited 17 months to have, and It will never leave my mind, the way I felt that day. To imagine that we now have the most perfect and wonderful daughter... it brings tears to your eyes... any mom knows that feeling. Most dads too!

Last night I worked on daycare paperwork, although I know it's quite OCD, I am saving every single paper that they send home with her. Each day I get a report of what she ate and when, when her diapers were changed, etc. etc. And I can't possibly part with one of them. I am sure that will go away someday, but for now I have them organized by date in a accordion file. They even say who picked her up that night (dad or mom) and when I took in new diapers or wipes for the stash. It's crazy. I do also keep a photocopy of each statement and check that I write for daycare, so that I have proof for tax purposes. I need to get myself a sheet feeding scanner so that I can nix all this paper and go electronic with all my receipts. Mwaaahahaha! I also marked all my received Christmas Cards in my book last night. I keep a detailed list of who I sent/received cards from each year. It's in the same book that I store all my birthday/anniversary information, and It's like the bible. Okay, maybe it's more factual than the bible (Oh... Harsh!)

Parents magazine somehow goofed my subscription a bit, I started to receive two issues at a time about three months ago. I had shopped somewhere online where I received a free subscription with a big purchase, and I was already a subscriber, so I thought it would just extend my subscription... but instead I started getting duplicate issues. Being the owner of a mommy brain, I would read the first one, then the second issue (the exact same) would come, and I would sit down to read it and be like "Wow this seems so familiar..." and then I finally figured it out! So I called and they straightened it out, which means that I am all paid up until May of 2012! Whoa! That seems so far from now, but in reality... it's almost 2008 Folks! Holy crap! Do you remember partying like it was 1999? Where is the time going? Sometimes when I think about it I get all upset. This IS the best time of my life so far, and even though I am not quite 30 yet, I often think about being old and dying and leaving my daughter and my husband and my family, and it freaks me out bad. So I really have to steer clear of that mental image and live in the here and now.

On My iPod-
Now Playing: Song For a Winter's Night
Album: Sarah McLachlan's Wintersong