I received a letter this week (on paper, via mail) signed from Dr. James Dobson, and Focus on the Family. I was just able to read it, and was very unsettled- wait... ANGRY. Particularly by his suggestion that we should shield our daughters from cultural influences that will encourage them to come home with piercings, hair dyed green, orange, purple, and pink, and *gasp* become lesbians. This is the most ridiculous and offensive assumption. I could go ON and ON. Seriously? The letter starts by talking about issues with child pornography, two 7 year olds in California who were naked in the classroom with the teacher present... (which is horrifying) and then discusses the new MTV Series SKINS (which I am really not interested in.... am mildly sickened by, and also recognize that it's on CABLE and not on "regular" broadcast TV... I don't let my children watch MTV... so.....) and then proceeds to place same sex relationships and piercings at a similar level? My respect for this man has just dropped. By at least 50%.
I wish he was focusing more on ways to make our children confident and loving, and teach them morals that we hope will carry them through their lifetimes.... As a mother, will I be more effective spending my time on my own children, and preparing them for what is out there in this world, and empowering them to make educated and responsible decisions no matter what others are doing.... or more effective sending money to Dr. James Dobson and attacking lesbians? Seriously?
I was also particularly disgusted by his mention (which he is quoting from his newest book "Bringing Up Girls" which I had considered purchasing- emphasis on HAD!!!!) that our girls could become "brash, loud, and aggressive in their relationships with males." Versus what? Meek and submissive? Oh yes. Don't teach your daughters to speak their minds, stand up for themselves, or ask for equal rights and treatment. That would bad! And he goes on further to say "Is it your desire that they imitate rogue masculine behavior, such as being quick-tempered, immodest, insensitive, and disrespectful to others? Do you want them to be foulmouthed, cruel, rude, profane and discourteous?" He continues to say that popular culture will take care of these things for us, corrupting our "vulnerable little girls."
I am sure that everyone knows that boys and girls are different, and that girls can be sweet in certain ways while boys can be more agressive and rambunctious. But to assert that society is doing our girls a disservice by making them loud and aggressive, really really irks me. The last thing I will do is raise my daughter to be meek and submissive towards men... I'd rather her be a pierced, tattooed, independent woman who is true to herself and others.... I'd rather her be a *gasp* lesbian. I'd rather her be open-minded, caring, and accepting of all people.... than closed-minded, meek, and judgmental, and in an unhappy marriage.
I have heard Dr. James Dobson and Focus on the Family say many things and give several pieces of advice that I believe it, but this time I have heard, unquestionably, things that absolutely disgust and offend me. Judgments that I (and many other parents) work very diligently to prevent our children from passing. Not to mention protect them from being the judged in their future lives.
This letter gave me a sneak peek into exactly what propaganda Dr. Dobson uses to sell his books. It was almost like I was given an "inside look" at a very politically incorrect side of Focus on the Family. Which has no place in my family.
When he mentioned that he wants to help us raise God-fearing children, I actually laughed out loud.
This letter was included with my card and a pre-addressed envelope for me to send my donation back to help support this campaign. Right.
1 comment:
Hey Meagan. Just found your blog. Thanks for this post. That seems like a really unfortunate newsletter. I think James Dobson has some good things to say on parenting but also some increasingly BAD things to say. I also think that his politics have got in the way of his 'focus on the family.' Doesn't seem so family-focused any more to me!
Good to see you again today at playgroup!
Christiana
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