bcrnews.com | Bureau County MOPS will meet Sept. 7

bcrnews.com | Bureau County MOPS will meet Sept. 7

Updating from the Hospital

Well, tonight I am blogging from the hospital! Yep. Don't fret, I feel just fine. It's nice and quiet here and I just ate an entire meal without being harassed or interrupted. I have wireless internet, my laptop, my hard drive, my cell phone, and my iPod. I have crochet. I have removed the velcro from a whole stack of BGOS diapers, and I am drinking Cinnamon Apple Tea. What hotel is this you ask? LOL. Well, it started out being another "attack" at about 6:30 this morning and by noon I had scheduled a HIDA scan (Nuclear Med injection that is then watched on Xray to see how gallbladder is functioning) and bloodwork and a urinalysis. I was splitting my time between the bathroom and the couch at home and eventually it just got worse and I decided I was going to the hospital to get some pain meds or something to relieve the pain and that I was going to ask them to admit me and figure out what is wrong. Not too long after being in the ER they had already put in an IV for fluids and given me an antinausea drug that helped immediately. It also made me verrrry sleepy. I was already very tired, so it was a good deal. I slept in the ER until they took me upstairs, and then I slept the whole way upstairs. I know this place by heart so I knew with each bump where we were rolling too next. Once I got into my room I got settled and slept right till 5pm when Evan and the nurse walked in the door. I have felt fine since then, and have consulted with the surgeon and also gotten permission to eat. I was so hungry! I devoured chicken noodle soup, mashed potatoes, applesauce, and a fruit plate with yogurt. I hadn't eaten in about 24 hours.

As of n0w, the general consensus is that the problem is likely NOT my gallbladder but perhaps some type of bowel irritation, whether it be IBS or another inflammation. They mentioned Crohn's, but only long enough to tell me that while it seems like the symptoms are similar, it likely is not. Fasting after midnight and then an early wake-up with a HIDA scan in the morning. Then I will eat breakfast and depending on how well the scan goes, I will be able to go home tomorrow. The surgeon thinks that the best course of action next is a double scope (colonoscopy and upper scope too.) and that will be done as a follow up procedure after I meet with the gastroenterologist.

I have been using this time to rest and get some sleep, and also to do a few things while I have some peace and quiet. Mom brought me some clothes in case I get released tomorrow, and also my laptop and hard drive, so I can do some work and be online.

So that's the scoop so far. Not sure what exactly I have going on but am certainly on the track to figure it out I hope. I am feeling sleepy again, and can't believe it's already 8pm, but again, can't believe it's ONLY 8pm. Strange.

Showered and Sewn

I should *so* be in bed right now. It's almost 1am (early for me, that's what you're thinking.... I can see it in your eyes!) but tomorrow Ardyn and I have a come and go bridal shower in the morning for my "soon-to-be" sister-in-law Bekah. STBSIL. Did you get that? I am excited about it. We should have a great time. What's really cool about Bekah? Well, I have known her since she was a wee little girl. In fact, she was in my sister's class. She used to spend the night at our house every New Year's Eve. And her birthday is New Year's Day. Cool. She will be an excellent aunt. She keeps Evan's brother in line. I love her and the kids love her ;) We are blessed.

I bought a dress to wear. Well, actually, my Kohl's Cash bought a dress. I am this strange size between a misses XL and a Women's 1X. Basically, my boobs require a 1X in some cases, but then the 1X is generally too large everywhere else. This is a stretchy silky dress, and it has a belt at empire level. Really the dress is a bit too big, but since the breast area is sufficient, I figured I can work with it. In fact, the belt is an elastic 80's style belt. Wide with a metal clasp in the front. And I had to take 6" off the belt to even get it to fit without stretching it at all. Who MAKES these clothes? I am not skinny. But I sure feel like I am when I have to take all that off a belt. So basically because I can sew, I just cut the belt off the clasp and will sew it back on. it's all ready to go. But I can't bring myself to sew it. I need to put the black thread on the machine, and sit down, and run a quick stitch to tack it into place. And I am too lazy. I will curse myself at 9am when I am late. But it's a come and go shower. But I would rather be there the whole time to take pictures. We got a little gift from Ardyn for Bekah. Ardyn is her flower girl. I can't wait for Ardyn to give it to her, because Ardyn decorated the paper herself with markers. It's cute. At least I think so.

I have lots of worthwhile things to say, but I also just realized that in addition to cleaning off my bed BEFORE I can sleep, I also have to make a card for each of the gifts and sew that belt and be at the shower by 9am. Shit. Probably not going to happen. *sigh*

Goodnight!

Just to be on the Safe Side...

I should not be awake. I should not be awake. I should not be awake!

I have been doing so well, getting to sleep between 10-11pm for the past several nights. I am trying to get myself on a schedule that will work well with back to school, but right now it pretty much means a schedule in which I don't get to spend time with my kids as much during the day because I am busy trying to accomplish things that I would regularly do after they go to sleep.

Marek was up at 5:30 today, and Ardyn by 8:15. The day before Marek was up at 6 and Ardyn at 7. This might kill me. I just want everyone to know that. If I die, it's because I had to get up before 9am. I do really miss my late nights... er.... early mornings. But what I really want is to go to bed early AND wake up when I want. Not everyday, just ONCE?! Please?

Today was an insanely productive day, but overall it really felt good. I was up so early that I was working on things like the MOPS Website, and some other MOPS Documents, and doing some organizing, communicating, and brainstorming for the upcoming MOPS year. I am thrilled to be a part of the Steering Team this year, and as Discussion Group Leader, I really hope that I can encourage moms to open up and use each other as a resource.

This afternoon I went to have my first mammogram. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer at 40, during her baseline mammo. The "rule" is that you should have a baseline done 10 years prior to the age your mother was diagnosed. I should have gone at 30, but I have been pregnant and/or breastfeeding since I was 28. I decided that because Marek is almost weaned, I really wanted to be proactive and push to get this done. The mammo itself was NOT painful at all. And I really do mean AT ALL. I wasn't even worried about that part of it, because Marek often steps on them, or of course bites them, and so I have a really high pain tolerance when it comes to that, and I also am pretty desensitized. Plus, the more you have, the less it tends to hurt, and I have enough to go around. And around again.

The only uncomfortable part was when I was told that there was a mass showing up in my left breast, and that I would need an ultrasound to determine more about it. I did begin to worry a bit. Not alot, because I knew it could be anything, but yes, I was worrying. Then I got the ultrasound, and sure enough, I could see the mass on the US, and see the tech measure it, and I was a little more nervous. Especially because the "mass" was exactly over a spot that I had just begun to feel about two weeks ago. But the mass was so hard, that it actually felt like bone. The only thing that made me worry that it wasn't bone, was the fact that I didn't have a matching mass on the opposite side. Now, I know that someone is saying "you don't have bones in your boobies!" but it is actually under my arm, on my side, right where the breast tissue meets that bone that runs down your side, right under where your underwire would be. When I felt the "mass" myself, I didn't panic because I knew I already had the Mammo scheduled, and I thought it could have been more of a sore spot due to this weaning thing he has been doing, and because it was so hard that it felt like bone or a calcification of some type.

So when they said they saw a mass on the mammo, I didn't really even remember at first that I had ever felt anything, because I really did NOT think it was anything. Of course, once she started to do the ultrasound, and the mass showed up right where I had felt that hard spot, I was like.... oh no. And then when she sent the images to the radiologist and came back in saying that he wanted to SEE her do the ultrasound for a closer look, I remember thinking.... I can NOT have cancer right now. Isn't that amazing how your mindset thinks? Not "I can't have cancer" because I think I have no control over that, but "I can't have cancer NOW." Why now? Because I have two very small beings that I am completely and totally responsible for. I can NOT be sick. I can NOT. I started to really stress and I decided that really, if it was something, it was already there. There was absolutely nothing that I could do. And so, I closed my eyes and prayed. And then I prayed some more. And then the radiologist came in, and we did the ultrasound for a third time (she had already done it a second time while waiting for him, to make sure she could find it again easily, which of course she could) and then the radiologist told us that it was a cyst and that he is "pretty sure" about that. And we talked about what I should watch for and when I should follow up. I am looking forward to discussing it with my midwife tomorrow, to hear her thoughts on a follow up time. 6 months would make me feel better than 1 year, unless it grows. Because it is so easy for me to feel, I would think that I would be aware of growth fairly easily. I am not completely convinced that it might not be related to weaning.

So. One thing I forgot to mention.... On my way to the hospital I was driving up main street and the car in front of me decided to park. To my astonishment and shock, instead of pulling right into the parking space, they pulled in, and then accelerated quickly (gas instead of brake?) up over the sidewalk and right into the front of the old Ragamuffins/Green River books store (which luckily is empty!) It was a scary sight, but amazingly there was a county police officer parked IN his car, just two spaces away, and he saw the entire thing and was there instantly.

After my appointment I went to Hallmark to pick up some wrapping paper to add to my diminished stash, and to look for black curling ribbon. Which they did not have. But I did buy a few more colors, and a birthday card for my dad. Then I went to get gas, and some lunch, and headed home to relieve my mom. The kids and I played around home a bit, and I worked on some more MOPS things, cutting out popcorn on the cricut for an upcoming project, and responding to messages from other steering team members. Marek and Ardyn spent some time in peals of laughter over the silliest things, which I absolutely adore. Then we got dressed and Marek and I took Ardyn to VBS, which was super exciting. I was nervous to leave her, because she still doesn't really get the concept of not just getting up and walking away. When I left, I told her that she was to sit by her friend Kelsea (who is a year older) and that she was not to leave without Kelsea (because I knew Kelsea would not leave) and then I left. Ardyn gave Marek and I each a kiss goodbye. It was too sweet. Marek grinned from ear to ear.

While Evan and I waited for daddy to come home, I worked in the kitchen a bit and Marek discovered dancing and sliding on the coffee table in his socks, which was incredibly clever of him, and very "Risky Business" - but in the end landed him in time out because I knew that no matter how cute it was, it was going to end badly sometime sooner than later.

When Evan got home we all put on more respectable clothes and went to pick up Ardyn at VBS and then went to Culver's for a late supper. I had to eat fat free because I have bloodwork in the morning and have to have a 12 hour fast. I am assuming that this is also going to be testing my cholesterol, which I am NOT excited about, because I just know that my triglycerides will be high. Especially since a busy mom of two has a hard time eating "healthy" and really sometimes forgets to eat at all. Although I have been eating alot of salad lately... so I guess we will see. Ardyn cracked us up at supper, she started telling me about her "safe side adults" which I was FLOORED to hear. A LONG time ago, about when Marek was born, I bought her the Safe Side DVD that talks about strangers and safety and is made by America's Most Wanted and Missing and Exploited Children. She watched it once when she was less than 2, but I could tell she was bored and didn't get it. Then last night, I had put it in in the van to see what would happen, and she spent the next 15 minutes throwing a hysterical fit because she wanted to watch BARNYARD. I wasn't sure she heard any of it, let alone was able to retain or understand it. She only watched 15 minutes before we were at our destination and changed the DVD to Cinderella. But tonight at supper, she proceeded to describe to me WHO her safe side adults were, and told me that she would draw a safe side circle around herself and yell for Mommy and Daddy if she were in trouble. Then we proceeded to discuss some "Kinda know" people that she might think were safe, but really were NOT safe. I was so shocked that she retained all that! And Understood! Thank GOD for that. So on the way home tonight we stopped at Walmart so I could grab a few things and the kids stayed in the car with daddy watching the Safe Side DVD. Let's see what she remembers tomorrrow?

I have so many things to blog about, three of them being product reviews. Stay tuned and I will get to them! I hope to remember to take my laptop tomorrow when I am out and about and get some things typed up!

5 years ago today....

Evan and I were married in Vancouver, British Columbia- yes CANADA! :)

We got married in Stanley Park, just below Ferguson Point, between second and third beaches. The only "guests" were our photographers and official witnesses, Chris and Lynn Jaksa, and our wedding officiant, Karen Ell. The ceremony was perfect, the weather was gorgeous, and the tide came in while we were all occupied with more important things. It's a day I will never forget, and I can't believe that it was 5 years ago, and that we have been together 14 years this October. We were just saying tonight how shocked we are that Ardyn is almost 3 and it won't be too much longer till Marek is a solid two-year-old!

You can view all the wedding, honeymoon, bridal shower, and reception pictures here ;)

My brain is feeling full!

It is a BEAUTIFUL night for a walk. It's cooling down nicely and it looks like it could rain soon, but at the same time, I just know that I should be out there. Unfortunately the kids both just went to sleep?! Yep, it's 6:41pm and they just went to sleep. I don't think it's really bedtime, because neither of them are in diapers ready to handle overnight, and Ardyn is in my bed, and neither of them have had supper... but it's certainly sleeping nonetheless. They have had a REALLY good day today, with very minimal fighting and lots of laughing and carrying on and playing together. And then suddenly at 6pm it all started to fall apart. Believe it or not this time it was Marek! He has been really bad lately with the pinching, biting, and hair pulling. Oh and scratching. Sometimes it's like a love bite or a teething bite, and other times it's a full-on trying to eat your face off bite.

Tonight I was repeatedly catching him attacking Ardyn for no reason, and when the meltdowns really started, he walked right up to her and sunk his teeth.... into her butt. Poor kiddo. She did the silent horrible cry and when she finally took a breath she said that she was BLEEDING and I checked her bum and she was okay, not even actual teethmarks, but I am sure it hurt more than just her pride nonetheless. I have been trying all kinds of things to get him to stop, and I think now it's time to go back to timeouts with no warnings. That's what the pediatrician recommended, but he doesn't GET time outs and he actually kinda likes them. A smack on the hand seems to get his attention, and so does a swat on his heavily diapered butt... but it never stops him from going right back at it later. He often sinks his teeth into me for no reason, and yesterday I ended up biting him back because he caught me totally by surprise again and bit me HARD. He cried and cried and then just fell asleep. I think it's a phase and that as he learns to speak and express himself better I am hoping that it will lessen.

Anyway, I seem to have plenty going on right now, and am head over heels into Ardyn's Birthday planning. I finally narrowed the guest list down to 23 two-four year old girls (oh boy, right!?) and found a park and reserved a shelter. I've spent the last couple of days testing out the Make a Cut software to make Strawberry Shortcake Invitations on the Cricut. It is coming along nicely and I am sorely regretting not purchasing it sooner. Marek could have had Scooby Doo Invites. Poor deprived little child!

This morning I finished all the cutting out and put one Strawberry Shortcake head together. The front layer of the card looks like it will consist of anywhere from 15-17 pieces. Her facial features will be done by hand with fine tipped marker pens and chalks. When I got cricut burnout, I made us lunch and then switched modes and started the pinata... making a paper mache strawberry has so far been a TON of fun. I still have to put two more layers of newspaper on it, but I think it's gonna be cool. Then I will paint it and then tissue paper it ;) I am so excited to see how it turns out. I may cut little "seeds" out of black paper on the cricut to attach to the finished strawberry. We'll see. Oh and I am also making little lollipop boxes that convert lollipops to strawberries. I cut all those out too and will assemble them once I find some delicious suckers.

And then also on my mind is "back to school" which for us will be the first ever school year for Ardyn. I was thinking all along that it really isn't that big of a deal, after all she's just going to half day preschool twice a week. But then I realized, that she is still growing up so fast (she's still 2, I know you are laughing at me) and that once she starts school, she will just keep going. For what seems like forever. She will go to school as long as she is in my care. This summer and school thing is going to continue for a LONG time. She has new clothes and socks and underwear (birthday gifts) so that is covered, she has her backpack, and that's really about all you need when you don't eat lunch at school or take school supplies. I have fabric here to make her two fall jackets (I hope that happens soon!)

She also starts dance this fall, which is right at the same time as preschool, and her dance stuff is all ready and packed. All that's left is to label everything, and today my new name labels for her arrived from Twisted Sticker and they are adorable! I can't wait to try them out and write a review of them. This isn't your average kids' sticker company... Thank GOD! Do we need another girl in the school system with a princess crown on all of her belongings? Or another boy with dinosaur and choo-choo labels? Oy.

My plans to freeze 10 pounds of hamburger and make a fabulous supper were foiled tonight, due to the unexpected (but oh so fabulous and regular) jamming of our garbage disposal, which this time didn't just clog but also backed up in the other sink. So now I have two sinks full of stinky green chunky water, with floating pieces of broccoli, rice, and whatever else gross things might be in that concoction. And that brings... Fruit flies! I hate those darn things and no matter what vinegar or trap or fly paper I use, you never really get RID of them. They just move on somewhere else and you don't know they are there until you go to say get a banana or a potato and discover those nasty little beasties have been feasting and hiding there all along. I read online where someone said to put a banana peel in your microwave and leave the door open a bit. Then a while later, close the door and *zap*. Rinse repeat. LOL

Tonight might be a good night for takeout.