"The Plastic Exterior is All I Saw"

Wow. I really loved Wife Swap. I have so much to say!

As usual, I can identify with both sides. I love to organize and label. But my house really isn't nearly as organized as Lisa Fine's house. I try to keep my sanity and know where things are. I try to create a place for everything, but the worst thing is that I can't keep everything in it's place. :)

As far as Tori's life, I am not the cleanest person. I have dirty dishes on the counter and in the sink. You will probably find dirty socks on the floor. The bed isn't always made and there is dog hair in the corners. That's life.

Probably the first thing that I noticed about Lisa? Her comments about appearance and about society and "judging a book by it's cover." She said "Society Does Judge Books By Their Covers." Was probably a true statement. But the first thing I thought when viewing the "talk like a pirate" website and you tube videos? That Ol Chumbucket was an attractive man that had a certain charisma and charm. I immediately thought that Mad Sally was a lucky wife. But later on in the show, Lisa makes him shave his head and cut off his beard so that he will "look like everyone else" (her exact words) and she justifies it by telling John "This is the real world. We don't get to make the rules, we just have to play by the rules." That disturbed me. You raise your children by telling them that they have to play by the rules? Whose rules? Wow. Whatever happened to thinking for yourself? I felt terrible for John. She made him wear suit and TAN. She made him go to work as a "filer" when he clearly explained to Lisa that he worked a 9 to 5 job for years and that there was more satisfaction from doing something that he loved. She treated him as though he had never been a responsible adult and as though he had never had a job. He made the comment "John has been erased."

I also noticed that the first thing Lisa's daughter said to Tori (Mad Sally) was that she was pretty. Instantly I thought that was a suck-up technique, but Tori noticed it as "judging her by her appearance" which I guess was true. And then later Lisa's daughter got angry and said that Tori smelled and insisted that Tori wash all her clothes (those that she had brought with her.)

I thought it was also interesting how Tori scoffed at their typical "my daughter's a cheerleader" comment made in Lisa's letter. I can't imagine that when you introduce or describe your child, you describe her as a "cheerleader." She's a 13 year old girl. Wouldn't you say "She's a loving, smiling, intelligent daughter." or perhaps list her qualities, and not label her as a cheerleader? That poor little girl. It amazed me as she proceeded to completely break down when told she couldn't do cheerleading for a week, and when she cried and said "I will do my laundry, I will wear Pink, and I will cheer." and then again when she cried because she wasn't able to function without her Make-up. I am sorry, but as a 13 year old I was NOT allowed to wear makeup, and certainly not everyday. Not to mention crying over it? It seemed so insane to me!

And Tori hit it on the head when she said that Lisa was teaching her daughter to be perfect at all times, and that "perfect is unattainable." And how about her daughter's comment that she has to spend all the time "picking out the perfect outfit" each morning and that she has to be perfect, or "I might have no friends and be a loner like (Tori)" Wow. True friends don't care if you are perfect. And not all 13 year old's get that, but wouldn't you, as a mom, make it a priority to let your daughter know that being herself, even if she isn't perfect, is more important than being fake?

I also got a kick out of the Fine family's "proper way to fold clothes" and Mad Sally's comment "Why would you spend all that time folding clothes that you aren't even keeping?" Um. Yeah. And their answer "That's just how it's done."

I really was very turned-off by Lisa's husband. He made CONSTANT rude comments to Tori. "Sally Constantly Questions Me." He found it annoying to be challenged or questioned. Wow. (we all know a woman shouldn't have her own thoughts or ideas.) He also said (about Sally's Rules) "That's really intelligent (sarcastically.)" and "You are ridiculous." Then later "A pirate as a role model is ridiculous." And then Lisa's daughter saying "Pirates have mental issues." LOL.

Over at the pirate ship, I thought that the family was actually fairly reasonable. Of course they could use some organization. Like so Max knows where his pajamas are. The kids could use some rules. The fleas could go. But those things aren't the end of the world. I love that their kids are encouraged to be creative and themselves. I love that they don't put labels on everything (I mean figuratively, although I guess in this case it applies literally too!) The feminist in me was a little disturbed when Lisa told the daughter "How are you going to take care of a family" as though her entire existence and growing up was only to culture her to be a wife and mother. I also noticed that when discussing her own daughter earlier in the show, she said that she would "make someone a wonderful wife." ugh.

I really think that John and Sally are both very well versed people. My favorite part of the show? Just after she forced John to get his hair cut, shave off his beard, tan, wear a suit, and go to a "real job" -- Lisa was complaining about clutter and disorganization and dirt. John said "So Let's Deal with the Clutter! But stop trying to make me your husband. Stop trying to make us YOU! You are SO worried about appearances that you forget what's inside!" True. So so True.
I liked how the pirate kids made comments like "I am not fucking Suzy Homemaker" and "It feels so weird to be putting my life into categories (when organizing and sorting into totes)"

Sally was right when she said to Lisa "your kids are afraid to make a mess in the house because of you. They are trying to live up to your expectations." And I did enjoy it when she said that everything was rigid and that "the plastic exterior is all I saw." I did notice that Lisa's kids REALLY enjoyed building the pirate ship and doing the play. It was like they were laughing and being creative. It was great.

But at the end, after Lisa got home, I heard Craig say to the kids "Put those in alphabetical order" and I about died. LOL.

What a show. I know that they cut out full conversations to make it seem so dramatic and that some comments out of context can mean completely different things. But it was a great show.

So, did you watch it? What did you think?

Thank God for TIVO

I am loving this cool weather. Fall is my FAVORITE season, and my favorite holidays are Halloween and Thanksgiving, so I am starting to hit my peak. It's like my annual peak season. I've got the fall wreath up, and a pumpkin, and soon it will be time to decorate OUTSIDE the house. Think cornshock, hay bale, Scarecrow, and Pumpkins and Mums, like 2004. Or perhaps wayyy back in the archives to 2003 when Pooches LOVED pumpkins.

Fall! Fall! Fall!

I have been eyeballing, for a long long long time, dark orange colored plates. Just the dinner plates. To use at Thanksgiving and put in the dining room hutch I will someday have. But everytime I see some, it's like $160 for 12 plates. So last night I was in Wal-Mart and they had them for $2.46 a piece, so I put 13 of them on layaway, and it will cost me THIRTY ONE DOLLARS. Awesome.

I also bought myself a cute lightweight reversible jacket for $22.00, since I haven't bought a new coat in about.... 5 years.... and it only cost $22.00 It's pink and black, sorta windbreaker fabric, with a pink fleece lining and a hood. AND it's reversible so it's a fleece jacket too! Sweet!

So last night I watched TV in bed with two People magazines and a bag of Soft and Chewy Oatmeal Raisin Cookies. Now THAT is what I call a night.

I was seeing all the previews for the new fall line-up shows, and Desperate Housewives is claiming to have "regained" the fire and drama that they had in season 1 and lost in season 2. Grey's Anatomy is now going up against CSI... but I haven't really watched the regular CSI in a while, unless it was a rerun on cable. I love CSI Miami though. I LOVED Conviction last year (eric Balfour, yummy!) but it's been axed for this season. Not that you care, but Shows I TIVO?

Desperate Housewives
Grey's Anatomy
Family Guy
American Dad
The Simpsons
Girls Next Door
CSI Miami
The War at Home
Law and Order
Law and Order SVU
Crossing Jordan
Mind of Mencia
Men in Trees
The New Adventures of Old Christine

I am a crime drama/law and order/CSI freak. I love that shit. I have watched Law and Order reruns like there is NO tomorrow. I watched two last night alone. There's that one new show on, that is supposed to be the "best new show on television..." and I can't remember what it is. Argh! I thought that I would set it to TIVO and see what happens.

Really I shouldn't even say TIVO, since that is a brand name, and we have DVR (digital video recording), but I am afraid if I just say DVR you won't know what I am talking about.

If I could keep up with more shows, I would go back to TIVO-ing Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Moral Oral, and Pee-Wee's Playhouse. But I just don't have time to watch ALL of that. LOL.

And did you KNOW that I could be a writer for the New York Times? I came across this article today where they said the show Men in Trees is like "Sex and the City meets Northern Exposure" (It's by the writers of Sex and the City) and I was like HELL-O? Did I NOT just say Northern Exposure? I thought so. Do you suppose the Times has a need for an Illinois freelance writer? LOL.

Another show I sort of wondered about, if only for it's delightfully politically incorrect title, is ABC's Ugly Betty. But I get this "She's all that" vibe (pretty girl made "ugly and smart" for a movie/television role gets made pretty again when she falls in love with the football star/prom king/etc.) and while I enjoy feel good romantics, I am SO not in high school anymore and I have enough GOOD shows to watch as it is that I am really not interested.

And (shoot me now) I have never seen the Movie Friday Night Lights. Maybe I feel like it hits a little too close to home, now that all the annoying Bureau Valley parents take over the bar in prep for football season, and annoyingly make us all watch homemade montage DVD's with clips of last year's football games set to music like "Riding the Storm Out" and "We Will Rock You." We all sit there at the end of the bar where the sane people are, and look at them incredulously. It's like CAN YOU see YOURSELVES? Is football THE Most important thing in your family's life? Can't you watch this in your living room? It's one thing to be proud of your kid. It's a good thing. But if you weren't shoving it down our throats before the new season even began, we might even be proud of him too. But jeez. I loved football season. My husband played. My friends played. But it was more fun being Manlius/Tampico Red Warriors than it ever was being "Bureau Valley Storm." Mostly because it got to be more about "how much do our uniforms cost" and "how many different t-shirts can we sell with our logo on it" than WOW you guys did AWESOME out there. It became more about the cheerleaders and the parents than the players themselves. I don't know anymore.

I am planning on going to the Bureau Valley homecoming game this year. It's my 10 year class reunion that weekend, and we are hoping that they will call out our class so that we can go onto the field at halftime. If it means anything, I hope that they can look at us, the first EVER graduating class of Bureau Valley (1996), and realize that the school was formed with much different ideas than it has now. It was formed to offer more classes and opportunities to all students. It wasn't about having new uniforms. It was about art classes and agriculture and foreign language. A newspaper and community involvement. It was about a BETTER EDUCATION!

We all came together and made new friends. And most importantly, I hope that it says to these stupid parents living vicariously through their children, that THERE IS LIFE AFTER HIGH SCHOOL and don't you god damn ever forget it. High School Football will not be the most entire thing your kid ever does. So make sure that your kids are doing their homework and passing their classes! Teach them how to be involved in their family and their community.

So that aside, I am intrigued by the fall TV version of Friday Night Lights. Honestly, I wouldn't have given it a second look if it hadn't been for Kyle Chandler playing their coach. That guy, he's awesome. I remember way back when he was Jeff Metcalf on the show Homefront. I used to love that show. When he showed up as the bomb guy on Grey's Anatomy, I almost swooned to the floor. All I wanted was for him to get together with Meredith. Fuck McDreamy. Kyle Chandler is HOT. So that said, I might TIVO an episode and just see what I think. But I don't think I can stomach it without comparing someone in the show to some egotistical Bureau Valley fan.

When I was in High School, I would have compared "Friday Night Lights" to Annawan. We hated Annawan. They were the ONLY team we wanted to beat. They were cocky. They thought they were perfect. All their cheerleaders and girlfriends looked like they would have a career in playboy. We ALWAYS, for generations, said there was something in the water over there. And I made lots of friends from Annawan in FFA, but I tell you, they were COCKY football players. I remember every single game we played against them, VIVIDLY. I remember how they used to ring that damn bell after every game they won and then one year we (not me directly, but someone from our school) drove over there and stole the bell. It was great.

Typical High School Football Rivalry. But the way Bureau Valley is now, it's sickening. Even Annawan didn't come close to the behaviour of Bureau Valley. Actually people around here are likening the Bureau Valley fans and players to those of Hall High School, where 90% of the athletes shoot steroids and 99% of the parents, teachers, and school administration look the other way. It's tough. Because how do you show someone who is that caught up that they are overreacting and "THIS IS ONLY HIGH SCHOOL. IT'S NOT LIFE!!!"

So, enough of that rant. If this doesn't give you something to comment about, nothing will.

And I suppose there is a chance I could attract some 'roid rage from some hall fans, or perhaps sone drunk Bureau Valley parents, But I will take that chance.

And P.S. - I have ALWAYS hated cheerleaders. If you think the only reason they spread their legs is for the splits, you're kidding yourself.