Two Sick Babies :(

I am watching Rachel Ray make egg soaked sandwiches, like a monte cristo but with apricot preserves and spicy seeded mustard inside. Yum! I would LOVE to make these for supper, but not so sure that this is tummy friendly for my two sickies. Ardyn hasn't thrown up since this morning, and Marek hasn't thrown up since Friday night late, but they are both still "down" and although Marek ate more regularly yesterday, he has had a lot of Diarrhea and is running that low grade fever still. For him there was no fever until the vomiting was done, and her fever just started... so hoping that she is done throwing up too. She has kept down a handful of crackers and some pedialyte today... but I am heavily rationing, even when she begs for food. But I did allow her another 2 crackers and she ate half of one and left the rest on her nightstand. I gave them each some tylenol so they could rest, and they are napping or resting now. I am just really really hoping that I don't get sick. I was up with Marek twice last night and with Ardyn once. She woke up at 1am throwing up and it was all over her pajamas and her bed and in her hair and so it was an early morning bath with new bedding for her. And I had stayed up late working on catching up on folding laundry... I was pleased! I was just getting into bed when she started to throw up. *sigh*

I have all the folded laundry looking at me now, hopefully later today when they are up again I can put some away. Marek has just been so tired and sad. He just isn't himself. I ended up giving him his pacifier back after a month without, because he was so uncomfortable and just kept crying. It at least lets him rest. Christmas Eve was the first time that I caught him sucking his thumb, about 2-3 weeks after he was completely free of the pacifier.He's been taking about two naps a day while sick, and they are averaging 2-4 hours, which is about twice as long as his normal nap. Poor guy. Three times today I found him just curled up and laying on the floor. Once in the living room with his pacifier, once on the floor in his room, and the last time laying outside the bathroom door crying for daddy, with his pacifier nearby. Just curled up on his side all sad. NOT like him at all.

Guy is making Mahi Mahi, Bok Choy, and Garlic Mashed Potatoes. Oh I am getting HUNGRY! It's hard because I haven't eaten today and I want to but I can't eat around the yahoos or they will want to eat the same thing and I am just not sure.

Later...
Well, I made myself some lunch. Ardyn wanted some and I told her no. Marek woke up finally and when I went back to his room he was laying on the floor inside the gate. He barely lifted his head. Poor kiddo. He acted so uncomfortable that I should have known something was up. He asked for some milk, and since he hadn't thrown up for almost 3 days, I thought a little couldn't hurt. He took one sip. Then he wanted a banana. I gave it to him and he didn't touch it. Eventually he tried to take a bite and as soon as he did, he started throwing up. A lot. All liquid. Poor kiddo. I ended up calling the pediatrician because I am worried of course. This is hard to see your kids go through. And then I started to feel panicky and anxious hoping that I wasn't going to come down with it too. Ugh. Both kids are now laying on respective couches in a darkish room watching Word Girl. I called Evan and haven't heard back from him or the pediatrician. I am going to bed EARLY tonight. I need rest. Need to keep myself healthy.

Say a prayer that I can escape this so I can care for the kids.

AWOL

Sorry I have been a bit AWOL. It's become apparent that my daughter doesn't always teethe gracefully. She started with a low grade fever early Tuesday morning, and has progressed to the 101.3 level several times in the past three days. Tuesday afternoon I got called at work and had to go get her from daycare. Because I am so worried when she has the 101 fever, and feels like she is burning up, I can't even imagine her with 103 fever. Or even worse, something higher. Poor Beeb. Tylenol and Ibuprofen will bring the fever down and improve her spirits some, but it doesn't take away the teething pain, and therefore the Dr. doesn't want me to give it to her. Instead we are supposed to do lukewarm baths, but that's not possible while at daycare, nor is it especially feasible in the middle of the night when you have to work the next day. Ugh. Sunday night and last night were the worse. Yesterday she did get her 6 month shots, and around midnight woke up with a fever again. I did give her a dose of Motrin because of the shots and the teething combo, and she slept for a bit, but at 3am was up again until about 5am when she finally screamed herself into exhaustion. Not much I could do to soothe her, I would get her settled and cozy on my chest or my lap, and she would scream herself awake again in about 10 minutes. Poor Beeb. This morning I can feel that one bottom tooth is up further than it was before, but still under the gums. As much as I would like to avoid teeth for their nipple biting tendencies, I don't want to go through this constantly for the next two years, so I hope that this one just surfaces soon and we can have a break.

So mostly I have just been struggling to stay sane and stop from being exhausted. Carrie and Cara stopped over yesterday for a little visit, and it was so good to see them both. More Diapers arrived today... and my first wool and the wool wash and lanolin.

What frustrates me the most about having a child who is sick or not feeling well, is the varied responses that I get from my husband. He is such a good dad. And he really tries to help, but when the going get especially tough, he is still able to fall asleep while I am up with a screaming child, and then when I am up first thing in the morning and getting ready to go to work almost as if last night didn't happen, he is moaning and groaning and lying in bed or sleeping when I am walking out the door to work. This morning I said "What's wrong with this picture?" Argh. This is another reason that I am tired of working. I have to be the responsible party, and I am the one who calls off work and stays home with a sick child (which is fine) but I still have to be the one who gets up and goes off to work each day and loads up everything for daycare, and pumps breastmilk, and washes diapers. All things that are especially pleasant because I am doing them for my child, but especially unpleasant when faced with the added stress of a workweek and traveling and packing and unpacking, and not being able to spend that quality relaxed time with your child or in your home. I feel like my new life motto is "Something's gotta give" and no one but me can see it. I need a t-shirt and I will wear it everyday. Something's gotta give. I can't be expected to live my life this way AND enjoy myself, right? Whose idea was this, that women be the primary caregivers, the responsible ones, AND work? Honestly, I am feeling more and more every day like that was just a totally retarded idea.

Stupid People.

We had a rough weekend. Ardyn was still sick and it peaked on Sunday when she woke up with dry heaves and eventually throwing up. She also had diaper blowouts and was really fussy and upset in general. Today (Tuesday) is the first time she seems to be doing better. Saturday night she was awake every 1-2 hours all night, not feeling good and wanting to be held or nursed for comfort. Sunday night I got her to bed on time but she continued to wake up and want to be fed. Evan then also got sick and it was not pleasant to be the only well one... but I am thankful that I didn't get sick (yet) because who would take care of me if I was taking care of everyone else. I never knew a baby could have dry heaves. It was horrible. I have had some crummy tummy but have just been very careful about what I eat in general. Yesterday I had toast for breakfast, Turkey sandwich for lunch, and Chicken Pot Pie for supper. Today I had toast again (out of milk) and turkey on a croissant with apples dipped in yogurt for lunch. Safe.

Sunday night was the hardest, but luckily I had taken a nap that evening. Ardyn was up and I didn't get to sleep till 2:15, and then it was on the couch with Ardyn's co-sleeper next to me, because Evan was so sick and I had quarantined him in the bedroom and bathroom. Ardyn woke up every hour and ate every hour to two hours... she was fussy and her tummy was upset so she would eat a little bit every hour. By 6:30am I had slept for almost 2 very interrupted hours... but then I got some sleep later that morning, for an hour at a time from 7:45 till 10am. Ack.

Last night I went to mom's and visited her friends who came out to eat supper. My cleaning people came and disinfected our germy house. Thank God. Of course, then today, the day after my house is clean, Hadley peed on the porch and I dropped a whole box of chex upside-down while making Chex mix. I got a hair up my ass and then I had to call Boyd in to eat all the chex off the floor while Ardyn watched amused from her bouncy seat.

So tonight I get to go to my Computer User Group meeting. It's my second "official" time away from her, and I am not counting the hour that Evan took her to his mom and dad's, because it was barely even time away. I am excited, so excited that I think I should be blowing off the meeting and getting some stuff done. Shhh... no one has to know! Just kidding. I will go to the meeting. But I might sneak out early for a pumpkin spice cappuccino all to myself. Drink my latte and pump breastmilk in the car. How romantic!

Ardyn and I went to Wal-Mart today and my main goal was to return a robe that I bought and get a different size, and to get some more milk, bread, etc. $106 and one annoying cashier later, I forgot to even BRING the robe with. Ardyn was getting a little fussy at the end of the trip. I had everything up on the conveyor, although it took the girl FOREVER to clear me off space. Usually I am annoyed because the damn thing is moving too fast... and I can't organize my groceries by size and type (cold, frozen, boxed, bagged, breads and cookies, you know?) and it really pisses me off to have space between my food. (OCD, what can I say) but this time I was constantly standing there trying to have a square inch to put all the crap I was holding in my hands. And she scanned my groceries with the speed of a turtle, I swear she read the label on each freaking item I had, and then would hold it in her hands for 10 seconds before deciding how to put it in the bag. I wanted to strangle her. I was putting bags in my cart twice as fast as she was filling them. Annoying. Then I had already scanned the credit card, put in my pin number, and answered all the questions. I packed it back in my wallet, back in my diaper bag, put the diaper bag UNDER the cart, loaded the cart, put the hat and mittens on ardyn, and was waiting for her to give me my receipt when she goes "scan your card." I said "I did" and she goes "put in your pin" and I said "I did" and she turns around, looks at the receipt printer, gestures to it as though it is god, and OBVIOUSLY if it isn't printing, then I didn't scan my card. If she hadn't been so busy reading every label on every product I bought, she might have SEEN my scan my card. I Said "I already scanned my card, put in my pin, and said NO to cashback. It was approved. I just need a receipt. " She just stared at me. Then she goes "Well what does your screen say?" with a huge attitude. Then I said "It says NOTHING." and she just stood there and stared at me. I wanted to say "YOU are the one who works here, why are you asking me?" She said "scan it again" and I said "I don't want to be charged twice." and she said "scan it again" Oh I was pissed. So I scanned it again, put my pin in again, said NO to cashback AGAIN. I had better not get charged again or it is Cashier Elizabeth's Ass.

Anyway. More later.