My Biopsy Results are Back. And Stuff.

So, this has been a really crazy month so far! Just late this afternoon I finally got the biopsy results back from my EGD and Scope. I learned a few things. Firstly, I did have the whole striation thing going on in my esophogus, and it was stretched.... but also, I have a hiatal hernia. What's that you say? Well, googled of course, it means
A hiatal hernia is an anatomical abnormality in which part of the stomach protrudes through the diaphragm and up into the chest.

Normally, the esophagus or food tube passes down through the chest, crosses the diaphragm, and enters the abdomen through a hole in the diaphragm called the esophageal hiatus. Just below the diaphragm, the esophagus joins the stomach. In individuals with hiatal hernias, the opening of the esophageal hiatus (hiatal opening) is larger than normal, and a portion of the upper stomach slips up or passes (herniates) through the hiatus and into the chest.

Fun, no? This explains the up high pain that I was having which was mistaken for gallbladder, and also the burping that I couldn't stop during an attack, which tasted as though something dead were living in my stomach, although it tasted worse than anything I had ever ever ever eaten in my entire life. Aha! So at this point the nurse tells me that there is no surgery or anything to correct this (which I google to discover that she is wrong) and that I can take antacids OTC and perhaps doctor will give me prescription PPI's or other alternatives when i see him at the end of September. And of course I research online (I love you google!) and find some alternative therapies that are working for people, like the HOPE Diet (which, ironically, until these attacks, I had been following 1/2 of already) and others have been taking Slippery Elm with fantastic results.

Interesting.

The lower scope revealed the scarred and inflamed tissues, and the biopsies revealed no IBD (Crohn's or Colitis) but the inflammation and irritation are there just the same, and so the nurse (who we have already determined does not have a fabulous track record) told me that I should add more fiber to my diet and keep my appointment with the Doctor. Bowel irritation but no bowel disease- So, time will tell! Not sure what's causing the lower inflammation, it doesn't seem like it could be a result of the upper acid, but could it be a result of any off these gallstones that I have collected? Interesting.

Drugs are awesome (legal ones)

Well, I lived through the double scope. It was seriously a breeze. The girls in the endoscopy unit took amazing care of me, and explained everything thoroughly. Dr. Kim is awesome. He has an awesome bedside manner and experience and education and he is running on time and efficient. It was actually a great experience. I was very surprised that I was barely nervous, even when the procedure was delayed for almost an hour because I didn't have enough fluid in me to pee for a pregnancy test (which is required) so they had to draw blood, which then took forever to get results back, and so I was IN the endoscopy suite ready to go under at 9am, right on schedule, but they did three other patients next door ahead of me because the lab results were not in yet. But I was back in my room by 11am and heading home at 11:30, although they wanted to let me go sooner I was in no hurry. They gave me the numbing spray and then two injections via my IV. Mary said "You're head will spin a bit" and then she said "anything?" and I said No. Then Dr. Kim said "anything?" and I said No. Next thing I know I woke up in recovery as they were wheeling me back to my room. Seriously. That was it.

I did listen to Dr talking to me after the procedure but I then couldn't remember anything he said. I think that in the afternoon I made Evan repeat it to me like 5 times, but each time I tried to remember it, I couldn't even remember what he told me.

Craig called me that evening to ask me a question about his new iPhone and I couldn't even think straight to answer him. LOL.

So overall it was good!

I intended to write more tonight, but am already finding myself tired. So maybe more this weekend ;)

Anyone want trade places, just for this week? Thursday looks good for me.

I've been trying to get to the blog for SO long now. I have several reviews that I need to get written, and I feel badly that I am a bit behind on them... but am looking on the bright side that they will be thorough reviews with products that I have really tested on a long term basis (positive spin... see how that works?) I really hate that now I have to go back and read my own blog to remind myself what I have already talked about. But tonight I am NOT going to do that. Sorry. Just not. It's my blog, you know how I operate.

This week is going to be SO busy that I am trying not to panic. I tell myself that God won't give me more than I can handle, but it's not what he gives me that worries me... It's the things that I can't help but volunteer for ;) Basically I love to volunteer, but if you see me coming this week, and you are a friend, do me a big favor and stop me. Just tell me to take a deep breath, reconsider, and really, don't take anything but NO for an answer from me. I just can not do one more thing without doing permanent brain injury this week.

The week has of course already gone off with a big bang, considering that today was Labor Day. And yes, three glorious Labor Days ago, I spent 15.5 hours in labor with Ardyn. *sigh* where does the time go? I would love to write a whole post about just that, and another entire post about just her Birthday dinner (we haven't even GOTTEN to the party yet!) but I haven't even uploaded the pictures from the camera, and I just can't fathom blogging without checking the pics and adding some for you to see. It's how I roll.

Tuesday is the big MOPS kickoff meeting, and most of you know by now that I am head-over-heels in LOVE with MOPS. I adore it. This year I really wanted to be an even bigger part, and help spread the word and the love to other moms because we can ALL use this support network. It has changed so much about my life and the way my children are raised and are able to interact with others. Without MOPS, Ardyn would not be in preschool this year. I would not have known that she COULD be in preschool (stupid public school cutoff dates!) and I really wouldn't have known much at all about the preschool that we chose for her. She wouldn't be starting dance. And I wouldn't have half of the sanity that I still seem to be clinging to.

So as part of the big MOPS kick-off, because I am now a Steering Team Member... I had lots of responsibility. We all did and do, but this year my position is a "new"one to our chapter... Discussion Group Coordinator. We have never had discussion groups in our chapter before, so this is very exciting, and really badly needed... but also will be a welcome challenge as we forge a path that we don't have set for us. So I have been working on centerpieces, names for our discussion groups, themes for each group, some creative/crafty stuff to go along with them... and also several forms and mailings that will go with the new group format. Also updating the website to get everything ready for this new season!

Tomorrow we have to be at the church EARLY in order to get things setup, and I still have copies to make and things to laminate.... all before tomorrow night's meeting. Also, did I mention that we have our contractor arriving TOMORROW to setup his gear and schedule delivery of our roofing supplies? And that is super exciting but in addition to starting the roof, they will also be starting (at the same time) the front porch. Yes. Front Porch. Home of my crap. Nothing says "welcome to my house" like a front porch sewing room and "scrap-crap" all over a temporary table. Be prepared to trip over cords and weave around containers. Seriously. But since I am finishing the MOPS meeting stuff, the table can be put away. Which had to happen tonight in case they need to get inside tomorrow. And it's 11pm and I haven't moved the Wicker furniture outside. Or stuffed the centerpieces yet. And yes, I know I shouldn't be blogging, but I can't HELP it. I should NEVER be blogging but I need this release. It's like a memory-dump for me.

So this week the contractor starts the roofing, and the tearing out of the front porch windows and door, and I have to have one side of the porch cleared before Wednesday and likely cover the sewing crap on the other side so that it can be moved to the "finished" side and they can work on the "other" side. When this is all done, I have this grand master plan to move all of the sewing stuff to the opposite end of the porch and get more light, as well as more room, and also a perfect view of the front yard from the sewing table so that I can watch the kids play outside and work at the same time.

Oh and then there is that pesky little thing about Ardyn going to school twice a week, and Ardyn also starts dance this week! I am super excited about dance, but there is just ONE teeeeeny tiny hitch.... the same day that Ardyn starts dance? I have my first colonoscopy and EGD (upper scope.) Yay me! If you've been reading (have I talked about this on blog or just facebook?) I have had these horrible attacks that at first we thought were gallbladder, but two ER visits, a fabulous one-night and two-day stay in the hospital, and bloodwork, Gallbladder Ultrasound, HIDA (nuclear medicine) scan, and a Abdominal CT with contrast later.... they think I have Crohn's or IBS. The specialist is leaning towards Crohn's wholeheartedly. And I have had a few attacks since being out of the hospital, the latest being about 24 hours long in which I thought I might alternately die, poop myself to death, or belch up an intestine. Yep. Good times. And this attack lasted 24 hours WITH double doses of Pepcid around the clock, a single dose of Prilosec (I was desperate) about 10 thousand TUMS, and a prescription Opiate painkiller. Yep. Still painful. That's the kind of pain we are talking. WTF.

So this Wednesday, I get to start my day by taking Ardyn to school. Then I get to take both kids and all their gear to my mom's, then I get to return home to a house full of contractors, and then I get to commence my first meal of the day, which will consist of.... wait for it.... ONE GALLON of liquid laxative. Yep. That's right. Those of you who have never had a colonoscopy.... don't be shy. Read alllllll about it. ONE Gallon of liquid laxative. No meals. limited liquid diet. You know what the GE's office staff said "You probably shouldn't make any plans that day." Um, ya think? Are there people who think they are going to drink a gallon of laxative and still make plans? Oh my. So they actually also told me that "we have several patients who say it's better to just take the gallon into the bathroom and drink it there." Yep. Can't wait. Did I mention I've decided I can't be responsible for my kids that day? And that I told my husband that he will wait on my hand and foot, even if that means replenishing toilet paper? I am so not going through this alone. Someday he will have to do this. I vow that he will. And then, after drinking half of my gallon of laxative, I get to drift off into a peaceful sleep. And then wake up at 4am to start drinking the other half, which I must have drank before my morning appointment, and when I am FINALLY done with that gallon, I get to take not ONE, but TWO ducolax prescription laxative pills. Yep. Because I am sure there will still be some scary poo hiding in there somewhere. After 24 hours of no food and a gallon of laxative. Surely. I mean, these doctor's are SPECIALISTS. This is what they do for a living. Don't tell me that they don't see some poo here and there? But I have to top it all off with laxative tablets. Not one. Two. (okay, ending my rant)

So. Let's see how my week is shaping up.
1. Setup for MOPS kickoff meeting, finalize papers and decorations, make copies, etc.
2. Clean off half of front porch and stuff crap in an unnoticeable corner.
3. MOPS Kickoff meeting
4. Sleep
5. Take Ardyn to school
6. Come Home and pack kids things for two days with Grandma and Auntie.
6a. House inundated with construction work. Marek screaming and biting my legs whilst cleverly unpacking everything I pack.
7. Pick up Ardyn from school
8. Take kids and their Krap to Grandma's
9. Come home to half-a-front porch and start drinking my laxative
10. Poo a l0t, hope bathroom exhaust fan doesn't transfer smell to roofers and knock them off the house.
11. try to sleep.
12. Poo some more.
13. try to sleep.
14. Angrily wake-up before the sun
15. Drink More Laxative
16. Poooooooo
17. Take two ducolax
18. Poooooooo to the noise of construction starting all over again.
19. Head to hospital and hope I don't poop my pants on the way there.
20. Register.
21. Get put into hospital gown and under anesthesia.
22. Swallow Scope.
23. Hope I don't know what happens when they "turn the bed around" (the nurse's exact words)
24. Recover
25. Dress
26. Get Driven Home
27. Get Waited on Hand and Foot
28. Hope that I want to eat again sometime
29. Somehow get the children home and take Ardyn to her first dance class.
30. Start thinking about when to have poor child's birthday party that I have halfway finished.
30a-30e. Finish Pinata. Finish Invitations. Finish Decorations. Mail Invitations. Bake and Decorate Cupcakes.

So, anyone want to trade weeks with me?

Remember that I said don't let me volunteer for anything. I mean that. Can I make myself clearer?

Goodnight!

bcrnews.com | Bureau County MOPS will meet Sept. 7

bcrnews.com | Bureau County MOPS will meet Sept. 7

Updating from the Hospital

Well, tonight I am blogging from the hospital! Yep. Don't fret, I feel just fine. It's nice and quiet here and I just ate an entire meal without being harassed or interrupted. I have wireless internet, my laptop, my hard drive, my cell phone, and my iPod. I have crochet. I have removed the velcro from a whole stack of BGOS diapers, and I am drinking Cinnamon Apple Tea. What hotel is this you ask? LOL. Well, it started out being another "attack" at about 6:30 this morning and by noon I had scheduled a HIDA scan (Nuclear Med injection that is then watched on Xray to see how gallbladder is functioning) and bloodwork and a urinalysis. I was splitting my time between the bathroom and the couch at home and eventually it just got worse and I decided I was going to the hospital to get some pain meds or something to relieve the pain and that I was going to ask them to admit me and figure out what is wrong. Not too long after being in the ER they had already put in an IV for fluids and given me an antinausea drug that helped immediately. It also made me verrrry sleepy. I was already very tired, so it was a good deal. I slept in the ER until they took me upstairs, and then I slept the whole way upstairs. I know this place by heart so I knew with each bump where we were rolling too next. Once I got into my room I got settled and slept right till 5pm when Evan and the nurse walked in the door. I have felt fine since then, and have consulted with the surgeon and also gotten permission to eat. I was so hungry! I devoured chicken noodle soup, mashed potatoes, applesauce, and a fruit plate with yogurt. I hadn't eaten in about 24 hours.

As of n0w, the general consensus is that the problem is likely NOT my gallbladder but perhaps some type of bowel irritation, whether it be IBS or another inflammation. They mentioned Crohn's, but only long enough to tell me that while it seems like the symptoms are similar, it likely is not. Fasting after midnight and then an early wake-up with a HIDA scan in the morning. Then I will eat breakfast and depending on how well the scan goes, I will be able to go home tomorrow. The surgeon thinks that the best course of action next is a double scope (colonoscopy and upper scope too.) and that will be done as a follow up procedure after I meet with the gastroenterologist.

I have been using this time to rest and get some sleep, and also to do a few things while I have some peace and quiet. Mom brought me some clothes in case I get released tomorrow, and also my laptop and hard drive, so I can do some work and be online.

So that's the scoop so far. Not sure what exactly I have going on but am certainly on the track to figure it out I hope. I am feeling sleepy again, and can't believe it's already 8pm, but again, can't believe it's ONLY 8pm. Strange.

Showered and Sewn

I should *so* be in bed right now. It's almost 1am (early for me, that's what you're thinking.... I can see it in your eyes!) but tomorrow Ardyn and I have a come and go bridal shower in the morning for my "soon-to-be" sister-in-law Bekah. STBSIL. Did you get that? I am excited about it. We should have a great time. What's really cool about Bekah? Well, I have known her since she was a wee little girl. In fact, she was in my sister's class. She used to spend the night at our house every New Year's Eve. And her birthday is New Year's Day. Cool. She will be an excellent aunt. She keeps Evan's brother in line. I love her and the kids love her ;) We are blessed.

I bought a dress to wear. Well, actually, my Kohl's Cash bought a dress. I am this strange size between a misses XL and a Women's 1X. Basically, my boobs require a 1X in some cases, but then the 1X is generally too large everywhere else. This is a stretchy silky dress, and it has a belt at empire level. Really the dress is a bit too big, but since the breast area is sufficient, I figured I can work with it. In fact, the belt is an elastic 80's style belt. Wide with a metal clasp in the front. And I had to take 6" off the belt to even get it to fit without stretching it at all. Who MAKES these clothes? I am not skinny. But I sure feel like I am when I have to take all that off a belt. So basically because I can sew, I just cut the belt off the clasp and will sew it back on. it's all ready to go. But I can't bring myself to sew it. I need to put the black thread on the machine, and sit down, and run a quick stitch to tack it into place. And I am too lazy. I will curse myself at 9am when I am late. But it's a come and go shower. But I would rather be there the whole time to take pictures. We got a little gift from Ardyn for Bekah. Ardyn is her flower girl. I can't wait for Ardyn to give it to her, because Ardyn decorated the paper herself with markers. It's cute. At least I think so.

I have lots of worthwhile things to say, but I also just realized that in addition to cleaning off my bed BEFORE I can sleep, I also have to make a card for each of the gifts and sew that belt and be at the shower by 9am. Shit. Probably not going to happen. *sigh*

Goodnight!

Just to be on the Safe Side...

I should not be awake. I should not be awake. I should not be awake!

I have been doing so well, getting to sleep between 10-11pm for the past several nights. I am trying to get myself on a schedule that will work well with back to school, but right now it pretty much means a schedule in which I don't get to spend time with my kids as much during the day because I am busy trying to accomplish things that I would regularly do after they go to sleep.

Marek was up at 5:30 today, and Ardyn by 8:15. The day before Marek was up at 6 and Ardyn at 7. This might kill me. I just want everyone to know that. If I die, it's because I had to get up before 9am. I do really miss my late nights... er.... early mornings. But what I really want is to go to bed early AND wake up when I want. Not everyday, just ONCE?! Please?

Today was an insanely productive day, but overall it really felt good. I was up so early that I was working on things like the MOPS Website, and some other MOPS Documents, and doing some organizing, communicating, and brainstorming for the upcoming MOPS year. I am thrilled to be a part of the Steering Team this year, and as Discussion Group Leader, I really hope that I can encourage moms to open up and use each other as a resource.

This afternoon I went to have my first mammogram. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer at 40, during her baseline mammo. The "rule" is that you should have a baseline done 10 years prior to the age your mother was diagnosed. I should have gone at 30, but I have been pregnant and/or breastfeeding since I was 28. I decided that because Marek is almost weaned, I really wanted to be proactive and push to get this done. The mammo itself was NOT painful at all. And I really do mean AT ALL. I wasn't even worried about that part of it, because Marek often steps on them, or of course bites them, and so I have a really high pain tolerance when it comes to that, and I also am pretty desensitized. Plus, the more you have, the less it tends to hurt, and I have enough to go around. And around again.

The only uncomfortable part was when I was told that there was a mass showing up in my left breast, and that I would need an ultrasound to determine more about it. I did begin to worry a bit. Not alot, because I knew it could be anything, but yes, I was worrying. Then I got the ultrasound, and sure enough, I could see the mass on the US, and see the tech measure it, and I was a little more nervous. Especially because the "mass" was exactly over a spot that I had just begun to feel about two weeks ago. But the mass was so hard, that it actually felt like bone. The only thing that made me worry that it wasn't bone, was the fact that I didn't have a matching mass on the opposite side. Now, I know that someone is saying "you don't have bones in your boobies!" but it is actually under my arm, on my side, right where the breast tissue meets that bone that runs down your side, right under where your underwire would be. When I felt the "mass" myself, I didn't panic because I knew I already had the Mammo scheduled, and I thought it could have been more of a sore spot due to this weaning thing he has been doing, and because it was so hard that it felt like bone or a calcification of some type.

So when they said they saw a mass on the mammo, I didn't really even remember at first that I had ever felt anything, because I really did NOT think it was anything. Of course, once she started to do the ultrasound, and the mass showed up right where I had felt that hard spot, I was like.... oh no. And then when she sent the images to the radiologist and came back in saying that he wanted to SEE her do the ultrasound for a closer look, I remember thinking.... I can NOT have cancer right now. Isn't that amazing how your mindset thinks? Not "I can't have cancer" because I think I have no control over that, but "I can't have cancer NOW." Why now? Because I have two very small beings that I am completely and totally responsible for. I can NOT be sick. I can NOT. I started to really stress and I decided that really, if it was something, it was already there. There was absolutely nothing that I could do. And so, I closed my eyes and prayed. And then I prayed some more. And then the radiologist came in, and we did the ultrasound for a third time (she had already done it a second time while waiting for him, to make sure she could find it again easily, which of course she could) and then the radiologist told us that it was a cyst and that he is "pretty sure" about that. And we talked about what I should watch for and when I should follow up. I am looking forward to discussing it with my midwife tomorrow, to hear her thoughts on a follow up time. 6 months would make me feel better than 1 year, unless it grows. Because it is so easy for me to feel, I would think that I would be aware of growth fairly easily. I am not completely convinced that it might not be related to weaning.

So. One thing I forgot to mention.... On my way to the hospital I was driving up main street and the car in front of me decided to park. To my astonishment and shock, instead of pulling right into the parking space, they pulled in, and then accelerated quickly (gas instead of brake?) up over the sidewalk and right into the front of the old Ragamuffins/Green River books store (which luckily is empty!) It was a scary sight, but amazingly there was a county police officer parked IN his car, just two spaces away, and he saw the entire thing and was there instantly.

After my appointment I went to Hallmark to pick up some wrapping paper to add to my diminished stash, and to look for black curling ribbon. Which they did not have. But I did buy a few more colors, and a birthday card for my dad. Then I went to get gas, and some lunch, and headed home to relieve my mom. The kids and I played around home a bit, and I worked on some more MOPS things, cutting out popcorn on the cricut for an upcoming project, and responding to messages from other steering team members. Marek and Ardyn spent some time in peals of laughter over the silliest things, which I absolutely adore. Then we got dressed and Marek and I took Ardyn to VBS, which was super exciting. I was nervous to leave her, because she still doesn't really get the concept of not just getting up and walking away. When I left, I told her that she was to sit by her friend Kelsea (who is a year older) and that she was not to leave without Kelsea (because I knew Kelsea would not leave) and then I left. Ardyn gave Marek and I each a kiss goodbye. It was too sweet. Marek grinned from ear to ear.

While Evan and I waited for daddy to come home, I worked in the kitchen a bit and Marek discovered dancing and sliding on the coffee table in his socks, which was incredibly clever of him, and very "Risky Business" - but in the end landed him in time out because I knew that no matter how cute it was, it was going to end badly sometime sooner than later.

When Evan got home we all put on more respectable clothes and went to pick up Ardyn at VBS and then went to Culver's for a late supper. I had to eat fat free because I have bloodwork in the morning and have to have a 12 hour fast. I am assuming that this is also going to be testing my cholesterol, which I am NOT excited about, because I just know that my triglycerides will be high. Especially since a busy mom of two has a hard time eating "healthy" and really sometimes forgets to eat at all. Although I have been eating alot of salad lately... so I guess we will see. Ardyn cracked us up at supper, she started telling me about her "safe side adults" which I was FLOORED to hear. A LONG time ago, about when Marek was born, I bought her the Safe Side DVD that talks about strangers and safety and is made by America's Most Wanted and Missing and Exploited Children. She watched it once when she was less than 2, but I could tell she was bored and didn't get it. Then last night, I had put it in in the van to see what would happen, and she spent the next 15 minutes throwing a hysterical fit because she wanted to watch BARNYARD. I wasn't sure she heard any of it, let alone was able to retain or understand it. She only watched 15 minutes before we were at our destination and changed the DVD to Cinderella. But tonight at supper, she proceeded to describe to me WHO her safe side adults were, and told me that she would draw a safe side circle around herself and yell for Mommy and Daddy if she were in trouble. Then we proceeded to discuss some "Kinda know" people that she might think were safe, but really were NOT safe. I was so shocked that she retained all that! And Understood! Thank GOD for that. So on the way home tonight we stopped at Walmart so I could grab a few things and the kids stayed in the car with daddy watching the Safe Side DVD. Let's see what she remembers tomorrrow?

I have so many things to blog about, three of them being product reviews. Stay tuned and I will get to them! I hope to remember to take my laptop tomorrow when I am out and about and get some things typed up!

5 years ago today....

Evan and I were married in Vancouver, British Columbia- yes CANADA! :)

We got married in Stanley Park, just below Ferguson Point, between second and third beaches. The only "guests" were our photographers and official witnesses, Chris and Lynn Jaksa, and our wedding officiant, Karen Ell. The ceremony was perfect, the weather was gorgeous, and the tide came in while we were all occupied with more important things. It's a day I will never forget, and I can't believe that it was 5 years ago, and that we have been together 14 years this October. We were just saying tonight how shocked we are that Ardyn is almost 3 and it won't be too much longer till Marek is a solid two-year-old!

You can view all the wedding, honeymoon, bridal shower, and reception pictures here ;)

My brain is feeling full!

It is a BEAUTIFUL night for a walk. It's cooling down nicely and it looks like it could rain soon, but at the same time, I just know that I should be out there. Unfortunately the kids both just went to sleep?! Yep, it's 6:41pm and they just went to sleep. I don't think it's really bedtime, because neither of them are in diapers ready to handle overnight, and Ardyn is in my bed, and neither of them have had supper... but it's certainly sleeping nonetheless. They have had a REALLY good day today, with very minimal fighting and lots of laughing and carrying on and playing together. And then suddenly at 6pm it all started to fall apart. Believe it or not this time it was Marek! He has been really bad lately with the pinching, biting, and hair pulling. Oh and scratching. Sometimes it's like a love bite or a teething bite, and other times it's a full-on trying to eat your face off bite.

Tonight I was repeatedly catching him attacking Ardyn for no reason, and when the meltdowns really started, he walked right up to her and sunk his teeth.... into her butt. Poor kiddo. She did the silent horrible cry and when she finally took a breath she said that she was BLEEDING and I checked her bum and she was okay, not even actual teethmarks, but I am sure it hurt more than just her pride nonetheless. I have been trying all kinds of things to get him to stop, and I think now it's time to go back to timeouts with no warnings. That's what the pediatrician recommended, but he doesn't GET time outs and he actually kinda likes them. A smack on the hand seems to get his attention, and so does a swat on his heavily diapered butt... but it never stops him from going right back at it later. He often sinks his teeth into me for no reason, and yesterday I ended up biting him back because he caught me totally by surprise again and bit me HARD. He cried and cried and then just fell asleep. I think it's a phase and that as he learns to speak and express himself better I am hoping that it will lessen.

Anyway, I seem to have plenty going on right now, and am head over heels into Ardyn's Birthday planning. I finally narrowed the guest list down to 23 two-four year old girls (oh boy, right!?) and found a park and reserved a shelter. I've spent the last couple of days testing out the Make a Cut software to make Strawberry Shortcake Invitations on the Cricut. It is coming along nicely and I am sorely regretting not purchasing it sooner. Marek could have had Scooby Doo Invites. Poor deprived little child!

This morning I finished all the cutting out and put one Strawberry Shortcake head together. The front layer of the card looks like it will consist of anywhere from 15-17 pieces. Her facial features will be done by hand with fine tipped marker pens and chalks. When I got cricut burnout, I made us lunch and then switched modes and started the pinata... making a paper mache strawberry has so far been a TON of fun. I still have to put two more layers of newspaper on it, but I think it's gonna be cool. Then I will paint it and then tissue paper it ;) I am so excited to see how it turns out. I may cut little "seeds" out of black paper on the cricut to attach to the finished strawberry. We'll see. Oh and I am also making little lollipop boxes that convert lollipops to strawberries. I cut all those out too and will assemble them once I find some delicious suckers.

And then also on my mind is "back to school" which for us will be the first ever school year for Ardyn. I was thinking all along that it really isn't that big of a deal, after all she's just going to half day preschool twice a week. But then I realized, that she is still growing up so fast (she's still 2, I know you are laughing at me) and that once she starts school, she will just keep going. For what seems like forever. She will go to school as long as she is in my care. This summer and school thing is going to continue for a LONG time. She has new clothes and socks and underwear (birthday gifts) so that is covered, she has her backpack, and that's really about all you need when you don't eat lunch at school or take school supplies. I have fabric here to make her two fall jackets (I hope that happens soon!)

She also starts dance this fall, which is right at the same time as preschool, and her dance stuff is all ready and packed. All that's left is to label everything, and today my new name labels for her arrived from Twisted Sticker and they are adorable! I can't wait to try them out and write a review of them. This isn't your average kids' sticker company... Thank GOD! Do we need another girl in the school system with a princess crown on all of her belongings? Or another boy with dinosaur and choo-choo labels? Oy.

My plans to freeze 10 pounds of hamburger and make a fabulous supper were foiled tonight, due to the unexpected (but oh so fabulous and regular) jamming of our garbage disposal, which this time didn't just clog but also backed up in the other sink. So now I have two sinks full of stinky green chunky water, with floating pieces of broccoli, rice, and whatever else gross things might be in that concoction. And that brings... Fruit flies! I hate those darn things and no matter what vinegar or trap or fly paper I use, you never really get RID of them. They just move on somewhere else and you don't know they are there until you go to say get a banana or a potato and discover those nasty little beasties have been feasting and hiding there all along. I read online where someone said to put a banana peel in your microwave and leave the door open a bit. Then a while later, close the door and *zap*. Rinse repeat. LOL

Tonight might be a good night for takeout.

Soapy

I keep putting off ordering my supplies for soapmaking. Just to get started, I know it's going to run me just over $100 (just for my ingredients.) Because I don't intend to make a business out of it, I feel guilty spending that much money. BUT I know that I will be able to control the ingredients, making a much safer and healthier (not to mention more beneficial) product for my family. I also know that the large amount of soap that I will be able to make with that initial investment is worth it. I almost had myself convinced tonight, until I saw the $22 shipping charge. And I just. Couldn't. Do it. I recently got a digital scale, the immersion blender, and a pyrex mixing cup large enough for my lye mixing.... but I still need the lye, oils, and goggles. The initial investment doesn't include any molds because I will use pringles cans to start out with.... but I have an 18 bar mold in mind and am telling myself that I can make it myself. If I can sew, I can certainly woodcraft, right? I keep telling myself that Mary Jane Butters is right on, and that since I bought myself a new drill, there is NO REASON that I can't own my own circular hand saw. I think that the most important thing is confidence, and being comfortable with your tools. I can do this, right?

The other dilema that I have, involves Goat's Milk. I really would love to be making Goat's Milk soap. The obvious problem is that I do not have any GOATS. lol. Goat's Milk has always been ideal for my eczema in the winter especially, and it's what I use right now and have been using for months and months. But when I make my own, I don't have access to the goat's milk. I know just how hard raw goat's milk can be to find.

I wish I could blog longer tonight, because these were just excerpts from my brain, but I have to get the diapers washed and dried and folded and put away before 9:30 am (and it's midnight now) and I also need to sleep sometime ;)

I've been Mis-Diagnosed!

I am so relieved. My mental illness has FINALLY been properly diagnosed. All these years I have lived in fear, thinking that I have OCD. It's actually NOT OCD that I suffer from, on the contrary, it's an often un-recognized disease that seems to mostly affect stay-at-home moms across the country. Really across the world. I don't know how it took so long to diagnose! I have OCU! That's right! COMPLETELY different from OCD! Yet the effects of OCU can often lead you to THINK that you have OCD! The confusion is understandable. OCU is the Overwhelming Choking Urge. Get your minds out of the gutter folks. It's that daily inner struggle that I fight.... the overwhelming urge to choke someone. Really they considered calling it OSU, but they didn't want to get it confused with Ohio State, which we all know is a very peaceful and non-violent school....just ask the wimpy OSU graduates you know (oh! BURN! JP are you hearing this?!)

Really, over the years, I am coming to realize that I am just fighting a losing battle. the OCU is not going to go away. Allow me to give you a few examples.... causes if you will... of this dreaded disease.

1. CAUSE: *someone* drinks the last 7-up in the fridge. They do NOT replace it with the brand new case of 7-up that is on the back porch that was supposed to be carried down to the basement fridge three days ago. They also put the empty cardboard carton on the basement floor next to the fridge... not in the recycle pile. EFFECT: When I decided that I can have my pop of the day, I get to the fridge and there is none. I have to go back up the stairs, get the case off the porch, take it down, put it in the fridge, and then take the empty cardboard back up to the recycle. Resulting in.... OCU.... the overwhelming urge to choke *someone!*

2. CAUSE: *someone* leaves the toilet paper roll on the side of the sink. *someone else* goes in to wash their hands and gets water ALL OVER the vanity surface, resulting in a pool that the toilet paper roll then soaks up like a wick. EFFECT: I have to pee. I finally find a second to run to the bathroom (most likely about 3 hours after I first recognize that I need to go) and when I need to wipe, the entire bottom half of the toilet paper is wrinkly and wet, resulting in .... OCU.... the overwhelming urge to choke *someone!*

Do you see where this is going? To an outside observer, this looks like classic OCD. I am cranky because the toilet paper roll wasn't where I wanted it to be. I am cranky because the pop isn't where I wanted it to be. This just means that I have a problem, Right? I want things my way? I want things put back in the place and manner that I have designated, for what appears to be no apparent reason except for the fact that I want things MY way? Right? WRONG. What we really have here is a mis-diagnosis. Classic, really. It's underlying OCU causing all the problems. It's the people in the house not being considerate of others. It starts small, and manifests into a huge huge huge issue, not to be ignored.

More examples....
If you are responsible for the children, and take them off with you, the honorable thing to do when you get home? remove the dirty diapers from the diaper bag and put them in the diaper pail. Rocket Science? I think not. This is just something that us moms know how to do. It's something that anyone CAN do. But when you don't do it, and we find them two days later, usually just AFTER we washed diapers, and the whole diaper bag stinks.... well, that causes OCU. Same thing with rinsing out bottles of milk or sippy cups. Not rocket science.

If you pee your pants, and you take yourself to the potty and wipe and close the lid and flush... can't you handle putting the wet panties in the hamper? Not rocket science. You've been taught. When someone's watching you do this, you automatically put them in the hamper like it's nothing. I know you're three, but stepping on wet underwear in random locations is not my idea of a good time.

Okay, I am ranting now. I just plain look like a complainer. But I just want you to know that the reason I feel overwhelmed and can't even accomplish my everyday tasks is directly related to OCU.... and the overwhelming urge to choke you when you constantly don't follow through and I am constantly picking up after you and getting sidetracked. THAT is why it's so hard to focus. It has nothing to do with Facebook. Or Foursquare. Or text messaging.

Now What was I doing again!??

What a horrible weekend!

I would give anything to be asleep right now. I know, that sounds nothing like me, right? Well I fully intended to be in bed early tonight, but things (of course) just didn't happen that way. It's been a crazy few days.

For some reason I didn't feel well on Thursday morning, and spent the morning in bed until about noon. It was not pleasant. I had lots of stomach cramps and diarrhea. No fun. I was miserable, but thank goodness Evan stayed and took care of the kids while I rested. The rest of the day I felt better. We just kinda laid low. I thought maybe I ate something at the baby shower the night before that might have disagreed with me. That night we ran out to my mom's so that I could pack up my scrapbook stuff for my Friday night craft night. For supper we took my sister to Mineral and I had some appetizers and then salad bar. I felt fine. The next day (Friday) I had a big salad for lunch with Tuna and that night I decided to have something delicious. We were scrapbooking after all :)

That afternoon, the power went out. Marek and I were in the kitchen making a fresh fruit salad (he had just woke from his nap) and Ardyn was still sleeping. About an hour after making the salad, the storm blew through. Right before it hit, Marek and I ran outside to get a rug and a pee pad off the clothesline, and when we got outside I put him down on the sidewalk because I couldn't take stuff off the line AND hold him with one hand, and I was in a hurry because I could tell the rain would get here very soon. I no sooner got the stuff off the line (there was just two things) and the wind picked up (from NO wind to unbelievable in just a second) and I turned around to see the basketball hoop blowing over... and headed right for Marek, who somehow miraculously stepped out of the way just in time. it was so windy he was squinting at me and then it blew HIM over and I ran towards him and scooped him up and we ran inside as it got even worse and started downpouring!

After the storm blew through, I got ready to head to Princeton. There still wasn't power here when Evan got home, and when I got to Princeton, they had significant storm damage, with trees down everywhere. Half of Princeton was without power. I couldn't get to the church because there was a tree blocking the road, and I called to let the girls know that I had to drive out by Tiskilwa and come up the country roads to get there. They told me they didn't have power there but had food and were scrapping just the same.

After I got there we ordered Pizza Hut. I had the chicken alfredo pasta bake and it was delicious as usual... but it had been a LONG time since I had it. We scrapped till midnight and then I ended up talking to a friend till 1:30 in the parking lot. The kids and Evan had gone to Happy Joe's for supper since we had no power, and ended up staying at his parents because the power was still not on when the kids were ready for bed. I headed out there after a brief stop at home to grab some clothes and toothbrushes.

We went to sleep at 4am and there was still no power. at 6:30am I woke up and could NOT sleep anymore so I went downstairs. I didn't know why I couldn't sleep. In about two hours my stomach started hurting and the diarrhea started. It was not pleasant, but at about 11am I went up and woke up Evan and told him that I couldn't deal with the kids anymore and that I was sick and needed to lie down. At that point it just got progressively worse, with lots of abdominal pain. Evan brought Marek up to me and we napped together, and when Marek woke up I tried to go downstairs with him but when I would stand the pain was unbearable, so I went back up to sleep. I couldn't sleep and by the time 1:30 rolled around I was in agony. I told Evan that I was going to the hospital and we all got in the van and he took me and dropped me at the ER. By the time we got to the hospital, I was hyperventilating. I could not talk to Evan much on the way there, and while thinking about my pain level (putting natural childbirth at a 10) I was thinking this was a 7 for sure. I could NOT figure out what was going on. I was afraid it could be something like appendix or gall bladder, especially since both my mom and sister have had them both removed. The ER Doc was leaning towards UTI (WTF?!) and so they did bloodwork and urine sample. I spent most of the time (2.5 hours?) I was there asleep on the gurney. I was just so exhausted. They gave me a GI Cocktail (which worked on the nausea and numbed my stomach and esophogus, and actually stopped the pain entirely.) and then when both the UTI and the bloodwork were clear, they discharged me with instructions to rest and take Pepcid and Tylenol every 8 hours and see my Dr at the beginning of the week. My dad came to get me and dropped me at home, where I slept from 4pm until almost 8pm when Evan went to my mom's and got the kids back and brought them home to bed. I still hadn't eaten in 24 hours, and was a tiny bit hungry so I had a handful of wheatables crackers. I felt fine, but about two hours later the intense pain started again and I was so miserable and scared. I called Evan and he came home, but about the time he got here I was almost asleep and the pain was less. I had cold washcloths on my head, my neck, AND my stomach. It was terrible. When I finally fell asleep it was probably somewhere near midnight and I slept straight through till I heard Ardyn pitter patter into the bathroom this morning. Then I sent her out with Evan to the living room to watch cartoons and I went and got Marek, nursed him, and slept on and off till almost noon with him. Then I moved to the couch and lay there until about 2pm when we put the kids down for a nap and Evan and I both lay down and slept till almost 4pm. When I woke up I was feeling a TON better and STARVING because I hadn't eaten in two days, and I ate a PB sandwich (no jelly) and had half a banana.

Ardyn and I cleaned out the fridge and freezer because the power had been out for just over 24 hours and we lost everything upstairs. Then I cleaned the inside of the fridge and the kids and I took a shower together. When we were finishing up, my mom and dad came over to bring back my van and helped me get the kids dressed. Then since I was still feeling well I took them out to supper (where I watched them eat because I wasn't thinking that I was ready for a real meal) and then we went to Wal-Mart where we dropped $418 on two carts FULL of groceries and then brought everything home and unloaded it. I put all the cold stuff away and left the rest on the porch for Evan to deal with when he gets home. Then I put the kids to bed and made a chicken pot pie for myself. I took my medicine first and I am sitting here writing this because I wanted to be upright and digest a while before I went to sleep. Boyd came inside and is sleeping on the couch next to me. Poor Old Dog. :(

Just about 10 minutes ago Ardyn came to the door of her room to inform me that she was sorry, but she had taken her nighttime diaper off (she's not night time trained yet, but can go for a whole nap) and that she then peed all over her bed. AND down the side of the mattress and box spring. I was so angry and frustrated! GRR! Now she's sleeping on the spare crib mattress on the floor of her room. Oy. And now I am going to bed! Wish me luck that the chicken pot pie settles well, that I sleep well, and that this week is much better, more productive (you should see this pig stye we live in!) and that my stomach does not continue to do this!

Couch Bound

I really thought that today would be a good day to play catchup. That was before I woke up with a backache and a headache. That was before I realized how comfy the couch would be. LOL. Because it's overcast today, we all slept in really well. Marek woke up way to early and I ign
ored him and he went back to sleep. So we all got "up" about 11am. It's after noon now and the kids and I are just hanging out in the living room in our pajamas with Tom and Jerry Marathon on the big screen. I got a Tupperware Thatsa Bowl out of the kitchen and three boxes of unopened cereal and made us a cereal snack mix. The kids love dry cereal, and making amix has always been successful. I usually get two really healthy cereals, and then something that's a little sweet to mix in, like mini cinnamon rolls, cinnamon toast crunch, or cinnamon life. Today we have the new Cinnabon Cereal, Multi-Grain Cheerios, and Rice Chex. It is DELICIOUS. I am REALLY not feeling the productivity today. Although my ibuprofen is kicking in, this lazy feeling is GREAT! Especially with the cloudy skies. If it would rain, it would really top this day off. I have three loads of unfolded laundry staring at me from the loveseat. I suppose I will take care of that next... but I feel some sewing coming on this afternoon. I have the fleeces in the dryer right now ;)

Jo-Ann and Rapping Hamsters...

Jo-Ann Fabrics TWO days in a row? I must be crazy, right?! Well, it just so happens that it's coupon commotion week, and I thought it would be SILLY to be right there in the same town again and not STOP and use a coupon. Actually, I ended up being able to use like SIX coupons, which was AWESOME. Ardyn and I had been looking at fleece with the intention of making little fall jackets for her and Marek. I have the pattern but I had it at HOME because when we went to Jo-Ann yesterday it was completely unexpected and on a whim.

So today because we KNEW we had to go pick up the door at Menard's, we went ahead and took it with. I'm going to use "The Little Hooded Jacket" Pattern by Favorite Little Things. We picked a girly jolly roger fleece for the outside of her jacket. It is black and white with gray striping and hot pink hearts. We picked a winter camouflage fleece for Marek's outer. I strategically did that because they both have the gray, which meant that I could get the inner sweatshirt fleece for each jacket all in one cut, which meant that I could use my coupon on it, because it was full priced at $12.99 a yard (YIKES!) Luckily little clothes take little fabric amounts! haha. I got a hot pink and white polka dot for the trim on Ardyn's and some Jolly Roger fabric for trim on Marek's. They each got a sport weight zipper in black, and I am excited to get started. HOWEVER the house is such a disaster right now that really I think tomorrow will be more of the same picking up :) It's making me feel disorganized. We've been running so much that I can't wait to just STAY here. Chances are we will be in our pajamas.

I am very happy that my Nikon lens is back from warranty work. I feel whole again. LOL.

I had to get a new hard drive (external) last week because my current one is full. I still haven't copied things over to the new one yet. My intention is to put the older one in a safe deposit box or something to keep all the photos somewhere else in case of fire. Thinking of Fire reminds me that I need to update my LifeDoc Binders, and in doing so, I should write another review of my newest binder, which I am WAY behind on. I've always wanted to keep them ready, so in the event of some natural disaster, I would have a copy of everything that we could need in the event of an emergency. I did great until just after Ardyn was born, and I don't think it was updated since. Oy.

Somedays I just think I would be better off packing things up or donating them so there was just less STUFF around here. I wish that I didn't depend so much on STUFF.

I am wondering... do you think I can embroider 5 onesies by hand by Thursday? Hmmm. Or better worded, WILL I embroider them? I got some plain colored ones as a baby shower gift and am thinking about embroidering them myself as part of the gift. Would that be silly? Sometimes I don't know if people would be like *What is this crap?* and so I want to make sure that would be at least "semi-appropriate."

OMG I freaking love this commercial! WATCH IT!


It could ONLY be better if it were the Beastie Boys. LOL. I ADORE it!

Okay, seriously now. Haha. I think I am just gonna let my fishville fish all die. I've got better shit to do.

I think I'd better watch the nanny and read over my jacket pattern and directions in case I get a chance to sew tomorrow ;)

Long and exciting week/end

Wow! What a busy week/end this has been! I feel like I am in a fog. Right now I am having a problem even remembering what I did last week. Think I had better go get the calendar and refresh my memory.

Tuesday night I had BUNCO and had a great time at Elizabeth A's house. Tuesday morning was MOPS in the park and we actually made it ;) I was up early that day but we were still 20 minutes late because once the kids got up and became uncooperative, it got all hectic, and I had some errands that I really needed to run, so I went ahead and did a few before the park.

Wednesday we didn't do anything, but Wednesday night was our MOPS Swim party. We had reserved the public pool after hours, and it was a great time. Evan went with and after the swimming discovered that he had kept my van keys in his pocket the whole time (in the pool) and amazingly they still work. The van has the type where the key head is also the electronic controls for the sliding doors, locks, hatch, etc. We took the kids for ice cream and then headed home to put them to bed.

Thursday started out well, and I got a ton of stuff done in the morning. We were scheduled for cleaning people that afternoon, but everything started falling to pieces when Marek started getting feverish and wanted to be held, and then the furnace continued (and increased) this terrible squealing that had started early that morning. I ended up stopping my "picking up" progress and cuddling Marek, and calling our furnace guy. That afternoon we dropped off Milk and Chex mix to Courtney and I got to hold Sheperd for the first time. He was so sweet ;) Then I took Ardyn out to mom's for an overnight, and Marek and I stayed till about 12:30am while I worked on her computer and we ate supper together.

Friday morning I was awake and Marek and I got ready to go. I had to go out and get Ardyn, and drop some vaseline in a tube to Courtney and then we had to be home before 1pm because Monica was going to babysit for the kids while I went to Princeton and did some painting at Annie's Little Pots. I also ran errands, including dropping off library books that I had forgotten to take back on Wednesday (oops) and dropping cardboard at the recycling center. Then I went through Hattie's Antiques for a while, which was the first time I was able to even be IN the store since having kids. It was nice. I grabbed a $1 coke and headed towards Sterling to meet the girls from the Walnut Scrapbooking group for a Girl's Night Out at the new Buffalo Wildwings they built up by Sauk Valley Cinemas. I decided to drive myself because I was an hour ahead of schedule and also so I could run some errands while I was "kid-free." I got brake pads and rotors to do the back brakes (I just got the front ones done a month or so ago) and then ran through the Dollar Tree and got lots of stuff that you just can't live without. LOL. Actually I got all the solid colored tablecloths, plates, napkins, and fork/spoons for Ardyn's 3rd Birthday party. (and THAT is a whole different post! someone remind me!!!!!) Then we met at BWW and it was so packed it was INSANE. The line was wrapped around the side of the building outside. It was really good, and we got right in because we had called in advance and Amber and Kendra were already there at our table. It was so nice to talk to the girls! Of course it was funny because so much of our conversation turns to our kids ;) It's ironic that when you get away from them all you do is talk about them! Afterwards we snuck through Bergner's briefly because they had yellow dot sales. I was going to look for jeans for Ardyn but then realized that I can do that anytime, but since I was kid free it would be WISER to try on clothes for myself. I got a new pair of jeans that were 25% off and then I had another 15% off coupon that Michelle gave me, and I got two shirts that were half price- one Columbia t-shirt and one Ruff Hewn "dressier" shirt. I headed home through Manlius and got this SUPER cool picture of the moon from the High School Parking Lot:

Saturday morning I was up BRIGHT and early. For some reason. I think it was because I was excited about the day. I got up and got the kids ready and took Marek out to moms for the day. Then by 10am we were on the road! Ardyn and I were headed to Antiquity Oaks. It's a homestead about 1.5 hours from us, which raises goats, chickens, turkeys, geese, llamas, pigs, and cattle. They make their own cheese and Goat's Milk Soap, and Deborah's daughter also spins the wool from their sheep. I believe they also do llama wool? They were having their first field day and I wanted to take Ardyn. Not only because I wanted to visit, but because I knew Ardyn would love to see the animals. And of course she did. Deborah and her husband did a homemade cheese demonstration, and I loved watching them make Mozzarella. I also got to stir the milk while it separated into curds and whey and it was really cool to see. I was really surprised how simple it was to make Mozzarella! I asked lots of questions! Ardyn loved the goats most of all, and Eleanore was a bottle fed goat that was running loose around the yard and Ardyn took to her right away, of course.

It was SO hot (96 degrees without the heat index) and we didn't stay but 2.5 hours... but it was so nice.


Deborah and her husband are such great teachers! On the way to their house we went down through Henry and Sparland, then to Lacon and on through Wenona.

Just south of Henry we stopped to see a HUGE Field of sunflowers. Ardyn said "mommy, why are those flowers sad?" referring to their nodded heads.... it was soooo cute.
We stopped in Lacon for a potty break and a photo op in front of the tank at the courthouse.
Then just outside Wenona there was a crop duster spraying the corn, so we stopped and watched him for a while.

When we left the farm, we didn't even hit the hard road and Ardyn said "Mommy, can we go get Marek now?" LOL. Toooo cute. But we had to head north through Streator, and then through Ottawa to LaSalle, and I wanted to stop at Joann Fabrics because I am out of black thread. AND I have been looking for some organza or eyelet fabric to use for Ardyn's birthday dress. We ended up being in there for like TWO HOURS and I felt terrible because Marek was at moms. But wow. Clearance stuff was great. They had TONS of Fabulous Findings for 50 cents a pack (they are regularly $2.29 or more)
I also got this corduroy (owls and polka dots) and some other little calico prints that I plan to use for Dortje trousers for Ardyn. The calico was tooooo expensive in my opinion, so I only got a yard of one, and a half yard of another. I hate expensive fabric... because I love it so much! LOL.

This fabric is for my next skirt for myself. The two base fabrics were clearance rack fabrics that were only $2.50 a yard. The top 5 are from a Fat Quarter Bundle.
The Halloween Fabric was in the 99 cent fat quarter bin, and I will make something for Ardyn. Likely a tiered skirt I believe.
And here is the assortment of Ardyn's fabric for her Birthday Dress.


I found this GIANT red button on 50% off in the clearance aisle. It is just adorable and it makes me smile. There were giant scissors too but I didn't want to spend that much. They might get cheaper... who knows. I got the button because it makes me smile and matches my front porch... and now it hangs right above my sewing table.

We found this embroidered organza sheer fabric and this silky soft Strawberry shortcake fabric on the clearance racks too. The strawberry shortcake fabric was $2.50 a yard, and that's phenomenal for licensed fabric. I am not sure if it will be Pajamas or a dress with the Organza as an overlay... but I am sure to think of SOMETHING!
On the other hand, my house is a WRECK. I mean, because I have been away from it for days, the kids have absolutely trashed it. There are things EVERYWHERE. We can't find two matching shoes that belong to anyone. Everything is scattered and it's pretty scary. I wanted to just stay HOME today and do nothing followed by some picking up, but Evan thinks it would be fun to go out to eat and run to Menard's as a family to pick up the new back door that we ordered and exchange the ceiling fan that was cracked. That is a good idea, and that's what we should do, and will do, but I just wish there were more days to do nothing ;) Really what I need is to have my kids go visit someone for two days straight (WHOLE days) and have my husband gone and myself home alone in this quiet house to focus. I need to get picked up and reorganize. I have my antique makeup table that has been collecting crap in the corner of our room for MONTHS that was supposed to go to the attic. I desperately need to switch the kids' toys out with those that are in the attic. I need to clean off my bookshelf and my nightstand next to the bed, and the top of my dresser. I have a laundry basket of clothes that has been in our room for MONTHS that needs sorted through. The bottom of it is things to pack up for "winter" and the other is stuff needs to get put away.

Someday.....